Ever Night on Falling Rain
by GriffinsMustFly
Summary: My sister and I keep growing farther apart, my new friend is even more lost than I am, and my dad suffers as he grows older and his memory returns. Now I find out my mother is not all she seemed. To recover? It's a long road ahead. Sequel to Battle Scars
1. Prologue

Gosh darnit all, I wanted something that could be completely and totally _mine_ for once. Something that I didn't have to share. Something that belonged to me, and me alone. Something that I could control and nobody else had any say in whatsoever. Though the thought was selfish, that's what I wanted.

Or at least, that's what I think I want.

I'm impatient, I know. It feels like only these words are my own, the only thing I can hold onto in this confusing shadow of what really exists. Half the time, I don't even think this world is a reality, and my thinking tells me I could be right. We are the reflection, forgotten and short-lived, while the world after this one is the real thing.

Not even the cutting thing is mine. It's controlled by darkness, owned by evil, and how many other hundreds of people out there share that vice with me? Not to mention the fact that my friends, my family, all have their say…I'm not my own. I never was my own. I always have been owned by something, and always will be. The only say I have in it is _who _owns me. There is no middle gray space in-between in which I can hide and claim neutrality, though there are many people who claim to occupy that place. There is only the light and the darkness, and I have spent much time in both. I long after the light but look back in memory at the darkness. The prince who leads the right promises a glorious transformation beyond comprehension, but His path is long and hard. The prince who leads the wrong rides on an easy road but his only destination is devastation. The darkness calls to me, while the light begs me to come home.

Each day is a fight over me, and each day I choose who will win.


	2. I Make Another Huge Mistake

_So yes, I'm back, and sooner than I expected. Apparently I do have a lot to do, but this stuff helps me to get my feelings out and helps me to recharge my writing batteries. I probably won't update as often, but I'll try to keep a good story! Thanks for reading, and if you haven't read the prequel, Battle Scars, I suggest you do because if you did not then this will make absolutely no sense. Thanks again!_

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What can ever change?

I kicked a plank down that had been laying propped up against the side of the house and strode off jumpily, wringing my hands and letting out furious giggles in between half moans. I had hit one of my most hideous mood swings, and my pleasant happy mood from seconds earlier had changed into an angry, brewing monster threatening to boil over. It was a monster that was not I, though it threatened to consume what was left of the real self. Something that took over…me.

Who am I? I am fourteen-year-old Prince Nightstaryang, the downfall of my country Pakavel and currently knight in training. I was a brother to my sister Everlightayin and son to my father Yomen and MIA mother Trinity. I had light brown hair, deep purple eyes, and a willowy figure. I was funny and ridiculous and brilliant and creative and angsty and furious and crazy and a cutter in my own self created rehab, all at the same time. I was still _human_.

And, as informed by my father this morning, would be still human for what could be forever.

Dad had told me earlier. So why was I so upset about it now? The news was that the reality warp was lasting a lot longer than expected…something was throwing it off. But why was I bothered now? I had just been sitting there, minding my own business, happily chatting it up with Rain at the kitchen table days after we had left my grandmother's house in the mountains…

Rain. A simple thought of her made me smile. She was the one who had made me angry, and yet I couldn't get enough of her. She adored me, following me around like a puppy dog after I had rescued her from Eradicus' dungeons. Though she liked me, I knew…I could see in her eyes…there was so much…_confusion_ there. She was disturbed, was looking for her own answers. Most of the answers I had but I didn't know how to say them to her, or how to put them so she would believe me.

I put a hand to my throat once again as a pang shot through it. My voice was constantly on a roller coaster of ups and downs, even when I wasn't speaking. It was painful, and it was embarrassing. I couldn't get two words in without sounding like a little girl or a tuba. Rain and Yin were always making fun of me. Sometimes it made me laugh, but most times it made me want to crawl into a corner. Dad had been the only one who had been helpful.

Helpfully awkward.

Another giggle retched through me and I actually yelped, "Ouch!" as another pang shot through my throat. I suppose I should be glad I wasn't a girl…it would suck to be my sister right now.

I went back into the house and pulled out a Popsicle from the freezer. Since my voice had been changing, I practically lived on the things. I sucked on it for a while to calm my raw throat and went into the living room to relax a bit…try and get my mood under control.

My sister was on the couch doing some sort of math homework. I sat down next to her and crossed my arms, asking, "Did you get any farther on problem fourteen?"

"Dude, I passed that, like, twenty minutes ago," she said, glancing up at me once before turning back to her paper, long brown hair swishing and blue eyes narrowing.

"Oh." I took another suck of the Popsicle. "Did I mention how much I hate Algebra?"

"Yes you did. A million times." She said. "And for your information, Dad said that he changed his mind and was going to put linear graphs on there after all."

I pouted out my lip. "I'm going to die."

"Yes you are." She looked up at me and we both smiled, until she returned to her work and me to my…juice…product.

"By the way, it's your turn to clean our room," she said, stabbing her sheet with her pencil.

"What! No, you've got to be kidding me. I just cleaned it last week," I said.

"And _I _just cleaned up _your_ mess last night. You can clean our room."

"Please, what was that, a bag of popcorn I left laying around? You're so lazy, I have to do all the work while all you do is study."

"You should try it some time, and maybe you wouldn't fail your classes," she hissed.

"Well at least I have a life. All you do is pour over those dumb notes," I snapped.

"At least I don't carve myself up like a Thanksgiving turkey!" she yelled what had obviously been on her mind, slamming her book shut. She had said it really loud, and the entire house went silent. Even the birds outside stopped chirping.

She must have realized what she said, because her face instantly became sympathetic and she said, "Oh man, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it…"

"That's alright," I said, my voice strangely distant. "Don't worry about it, I'll clean the room." I stood up and threw away the Popsicle stick, heading off to my room to continue my chores.

*

Various thoughts are running through my head. Mostly they are about Shiuh, my old horse. I don't really know why I picked today to be daydreaming about the young gelding who carried me through my childhood, who had been my best friend besides my sister, but I did. I wondered where he was now, and how fun it was to ride on his back. Who was his owner? Did he miss me, or did he forget who I was like everyone else had? Then again, he probably wasn't even alive. The raid on Pakavel had probably…

Anyway. It's pretty random, all this practicing. Magic is really, really hard for me. I keep on trying to blow up this freaking pillow with a blast of fire or something but its just not coming. As I try and fire I see that my magic is pink. A dashing blow to my manliness, but whatever. Yin's magic is blue… what does that mean, exactly? Why is magic so easy for her but not for me, and vise versa for might? We were always like that, in everything we did. Always the complete opposite of each other in absolutely everything, like two different sides of a coin. Yet when we wanted to, we got along really well. Are we interconnected in some sort of way?

My mother had once said to me something like that. It had been a pretty stormy night…we couldn't have been much older than five. Sis had been crying yet again. I had gotten up from bed to go get a glass of water, and she had woken up to find me gone. She panicked and thought I had been stolen. I had come back from the kitchen to find her gone…I had started crying too. We both woke up half the castle and because the place was so big, neither the servants nor us could find each other and it almost resulted in a small riot. It was only when my mother had come down the stairs carrying a bawling little girl and showed her teary brother to her that her wailing finally stopped…that would never happen now. Yin hadn't even noticed when I ran away a month ago and got hypothermia until late the next morning. Thing like that hurt…I knew I had to let her go sometime, but it was painful knowing that I needed her more than she needed me. You couldn't be dependent on a person like that, could you? You would go mad. But that day in the hospital, she had been really upset… Had my mother been right, and you couldn't have one without the other?

"Hey, watch this!" my sister cried from the other end of the yard. Rain and I both turned and we saw her flick her hand once, to have a flash of blue wind come ruffling through the flowers. "Cool huh? I think I found a new power."

Rain gave a very small smile. Then, before our very eyes, she threw back her head and a giant sparkling whirlwind formulated from the ground up. It picked all three of us up, and though me and Yin were tumbling in midair, Rain was levitating in the middle, not even having to try and control the magic. It was at her every command. I noticed she sent a special rope of magic out to me and I reached out with my had to catch the small tendril, holding on before she laughed and caused it to send me spiraling.

"Rain, stop!" I laughed, clutching my stomach as the rope whirled me round. "You're going to make me hurl!"

She laughed and only twirled me faster. Yin herself said, "Cut it out!" and in a not very playful way. Rain ended the tornado and we came gently down to our feet, the twister spiraling lower and lower until it finally burst into a spray of stardust that came tumbling down on our shoulders.

"Wow! That was amazing Rain!" I shouted.

"Big deal. I could have done that," Yin crossed her arms.

"You couldn't have, and you know it," I said back to her. "Weird not being the best magician around nowadays, isn't it?"

Yin let out a humph and stomped off.

*

Later that day I hung out in the pizza parlor, alone. I let my bangs fall in front of my face and didn't order anything, just watching the people pass by with interest.

Who I was looking for came through the door. It was Coal Embry, with about six other guys all dressed in black leather and following their large, sixteen year old leader. Coal wasn't a force to be reckoned with, yet I heard a voice inside me whisper, _Come on, turn around. Take me on._

As if he had heard me he looked and smiled. "Hey guys, it's the town loony," he said. The group laughed as if on cue. I said nothing and they turned away, ordering their food and eating ravenously. I watched them the entire time. They soon got up and left, and I moved away from my own table, following them.

By the time we had traveled several blocks Coal turned around. "Quite following us, crazy, before I knock your face in," he said.

"I really don't care if you knock me down. Everyone else has," I spat. He turned away and didn't even pay attention. As if I wasn't even alive.

I was so tired of taking this. Taking people's crap. I needed a vent, and though this wasn't the way to do it, I knew Coal could take whatever I threw at him. This was wrong, and I could stop now if I really wanted, but as if I had no control of myself I did what I was planning to do anyway. I strode up and jumped on his back, knocking him to the ground before dozens of guys were on me in an instant and holding me back.

Coal got up, looking at his torn jeans. He wiped off his face and said, "Leave him guys. It's not worth it, fighting a shrimp like him."

_Not worth it?_ My monster snarled. Why I didn't stop there, I would wonder for years to come, but I still tried pouncing on him again. Coal finally had enough.

"You picked the wrong dude to fight with, kid." The leader snarled. He balled up his fist, and brought it rounding into my face.

*

I limped home, taking up one sleeve of my torn jacket and wiping some blood off my face. I should consider myself lucky. Coal took it easy on me. I had seen guys put in the hospital because of him. He wouldn't have even been on the streets if his parents hadn't of bailed him out of the clanger. He had only held off because he was afraid of what my family would do when they found out.

It had been a fair fight, at least. He didn't sick any of his cronies on me. You think I'd won, but he was bigger than me and I hadn't used any magic or anything. I stepped in a puddle and winced at my reflection; there was no way I was going to get away with saying I had tripped. My clothes were ripped in several places and I had dirt all over. My face was scuffed up and I had a nasty black eye starting to sport up. All I had given him was a black bruise on his knee where he fell when I jumped him. There was a small voice in my mind telling me that I hadn't done all that I could have; I wanted to lose.

The thing was, I had provoked it. I had wanted him to start something, and he didn't. I had probably messed up things for him for a while, though honestly he could have controlled himself too. I had wanted him to hit me. How perverted was that?

Well I was regretting it now. I sniffed and turned into the backyard, hoping nobody would be there.

There was, and lo and behold, it had to be Dad. He took one look at me from his lawn chair, leapt right up, and ran over to me. "Kid! What happened?" he asked, placing his hands on my face and looking me over. "Were you attacked? Did someone jump you? Where is he?"

"Nobody jumped me," I said. I honestly couldn't care less what Dad thought right now, so I told him the truth. "I jumped them, and got my butt kicked."

His eyes widened in shock. "Excuse me?" he asked, as if he still couldn't believe it.

"I waited around for Coal Embry and his pack. I started following them, he made me mad, and I jumped him. I bruised his knee, he blacked my eye,"

Oh…crap. Dad was really mad now. "Are. You. Insane?" he hissed.

"Quite possibly," I shrugged, but inside I was shivering. My actions today were scaring me, and no matter how badly I suppressed it, I wanted help. If I dug deep enough, I could even admit to myself that I wanted Dad to wrap me in a hug like before and tell me that everything was going to be okay again.

"You can't go around starting fights!" he said, placing his hands on my shoulders. Even now I could tell that he was scared too, though his anger was masking most of it. "You're not a bully! You're supposed to be promoting peace, taking care of people. Violence isn't a way to solve your problems! Hasn't being around evil long enough taught you that?"

I didn't answer. I felt like crying, but kept a face of stone. I knew all this, so why had I done what I did? I must have seemed confused, so he asked, "Yang, are you listening to me?"

I gulped and nodded. I could feel that look in my eyes starting to come on and Dad asked, "When did you cut today?" He hadn't wanted to ask the question: it took everything for him to force it out.

"What?" That shook me out of my reverie. "No, none. I've been clean for two weeks, honest."

His face scanned my eyes, trying to tell if I had been lying or not. When he finally decided that I must have been telling the truth, he sighed and shook his head. "Why don't you go inside and I'll find some ice for you. I suggest you apologize to Embry. We can't be picking things. We have enough enemies of our own."

"The ones that I haven't killed, anyway," I said. My voice came out horribly choked. I hoped my dad would account it for my voice changing but he wasn't fooled. He could tell I was going to cry. He moved quickly away as if personally offended and I followed him inside.

I sat on the couch, wrapping myself in a quilt. This blanket was really cozy, but I still felt cold inside. Dad got whatever stuff it is that stings and put it on one of the biggest cuts on my face. I winced and hissed, and he mumbled, "Sorry. It's going to hurt. Bear it."

He handed me some ice for my eye and left me sitting there. I knew I was going to be in trouble still. He'd probably ground me after the swelling went down.

I felt awful. What was I, anyway? I call myself a defender of the good and I go and jump people? Did I regret trying to be good? Did I want to turn from the light, and go into the dark…?

No, I didn't regret. I have never regretted choosing the right thing, choosing God…I just made so many stupid decisions all the time. I can't believe I did that. If the black eye wasn't here, I could have sworn it wasn't me.

Rain came in the room. I tried to turn my face away but she saw me. She sat down on the cushions and touched a hand to my face, saying, "What happened?"

"It hurts," I said as a simple reply. I didn't know how Rain would take me attacking people. She looked at me sympathetically and said, "You're not crying again, are you?"

"Not right now," I said. What kind of a conversation was this?

"You cry too much," she said. "I have only known you for a while, and I can already tell that." She glanced to where my dad was in the kitchen and said, "Follow me. I know what will cheer you up."

She grabbed my hand, pulled me to my feet, and together we slunk out of the room.

Thanks again for reading! As an extra note, I really don't suggest jumping people (or fighting with them for that matter). It doesn't solve your problems and it's not very nice, but you knew that, didn't you? ;)


	3. Does She Know Something I Don't?

Where exactly was Rain taking me? I had no idea really, but she kept pulling me away from the living room and into the outdoors. It was just before a storm; sunlight was shining particularly through a patch of clouds and lit up the path our footsteps took. If I hadn't known any better I would have thought that the sun itself gave us a blessing. Or maybe it was just magic.

Her laughter echoed through the trees as we reached the outside of town. She pulled me further and further into the wet plants from the previous storm earlier and I got soaked, but I didn't care. I was reckless, wild, free, barrowing whatever freedom and help that I could from Rain before the darkness claimed me again…

"Come on!" she giggled. We finally came to a big tree and she started climbing it. She was perfect, as elegant as a lemur in its jungle home, but I couldn't climb for beans. I wasn't exactly feeling too up to it either. I kept on slipping down on my butt until finally she extended a hand to me and I took it. She pulled me up and I finally got a good grip, as we climbed higher and higher.

"Look," she said as we finally made it to the top. There was a plank of wood in-between two arms of the tree. Rain and I sat on it, our legs swinging. I pushed my head out of the leaves and gasped; the entire town was below us. I watched as people walked down the streets and their voices rose up to us like songs, while kids jumped playfully in the mud puddles. My sore eye winced as I tried to glimpse as much as I could, ignoring that the branches had ripped my torn jacket even more.

"See above?" she pointed. I looked up and saw that the clouds were moving as dancers, the sunbeams jumping in and out of the impending precipitation. We wouldn't be stuck by lightning, surely…not here, not now. If I looked close enough, I could see the first star of night peeking out behind a cloud.

We looked for a long while, until she finally sensed I was getting tired. She nudged me with her arm and said, "And that's not even the best part." She climbed down a few more branches and showed me a wooden slide, naturally curving around the tree and just big enough for people of our size to fit into. She climbed in and started sliding down and around the tree, yelling, "Weeee!"

Her voice made me laugh. She was such a child. But I wanted to be a child too. I got in and slid down, the fluttering sensation in my stomach causing me to cry out a cheerful laugh as I went around and around and around. I came to a rest at the bottom, falling on my hands and knees at Rain's feet.

A crescent kissed the top of Rain's black hair, making her look like a princess who wore the moon as her crown. She extended her hand to me and I took it, feeling our touch connect.

At first I thought I had been struck by lightning from the storm as a static jolt beat through my arm. Yet Rain did not look shocked, so I knew that wasn't true. I got a warm feeling all over, and there was this queasy feeling in my stomach worse than the one when I had went down the slide. My whole veins were on fire, my brain was muddled, and my tongue had swollen up. The strangest thing about it was that I didn't care. I wanted it to continue. I wanted this fire and life to beat through me, and never leave…

The thunder rolled in the sky and it shook me out of my reverie. Rain screamed and grabbed my hand, and we went laughing as the storm chased us back to the house, tripping on our wet jean bottoms and splashing each other in the puddles. When we got back to the house our cheering ended, and we bent over for air.

"That was fun," her voice said. I instantly got a thrill just from hearing it. But I couldn't…I was denying it. There was no way…I would just have to look into her eyes and find the answer.

I glanced up and it didn't take more than a millisecond to realize my assumptions were totally and completely right. Everything within me went against this, every fiber in my being was screaming that this was wrong, but I knew the instant I saw that stormy glimmer that it was all over…

"Yang?" she asked. "Are you okay?"

I gulped and nodded, trying to smile. I sorted out my thoughts in those few precious seconds I had, tried to make sense of what I was feeling.

She followed me around, she hung out with me, she maybe even loved me. But it couldn't possibly be in that way. She had been used so much in her life. I wouldn't take advantage of her wobbly self-confidence. She only liked me as a friend, and I accepted that. She was scared and frightened too. An image of my father broke into my head and I went rigid. How could I be thinking this? Even if Rain really did like me, there would be a chance, however small, that I would end up like him, alone, pining for my lost love. And Rain would be like Mother…

I couldn't let that happen to her.

It wouldn't work out anyway. We were too different, and I would never risk our friendship on something so stupid as wanting a first kiss or somebody's hand to hold every now and then…

"Yang, are you listening? I asked you how you liked it," she sounded hurt.

I turned away from her. Seeing her face was too much for me right now, knowing that she would never return what I felt, or what I had thought I felt and even if she did, I would never let myself put her through that kind of anguish. I cared too much for her.

"It was great Rain." I said as a simple response, smiling despite the flame inside. "Thank you." I went back inside the house and just at that moment, I thought I heard a low, sad purring behind me. Before I entered rain began to fall.

*

Great. Just blew my four week record out of the sky. Two weeks ago I had jumped Coal, and now this. Why can I never control my feelings? Why can't I stop feeling so self piteous? I really did want out of this hole…but it had been my life for so long now. It was just this never ending cycle…I didn't know if I was going to do it again tonight or not. Just getting through each day was a challenge…

I gritted my teeth. I'm such a complainer.A failure, a fraud, a freak…

Ugh! I was doing it again! I pounded my fists against the wall in the hallway across from the large window and sank down, my knees hitting the floor.

_I'm sorry Mother. I don't make the cut. _I shook my head and let out a sigh at my horrible pun. Nothing left to do now but keep chugging along…start a new record. Maybe next time I'd have better self control. I brought my eyes up from the ground and gasped; there, standing right by the window, was my mom.

She was so beautiful. Her blue eyes sparkled as she gave me a soft smile, and she stepped right through the wall as if it was made of nothing but air. Her brown hair seemed to blow behind her and she knelt down to my level. Her white dress made a train on the floor as she knelled and her diamond crown caught the light. She touched my face and gave me a kiss before whispering, _"Be brave, little one." _As soon as she had said that she was gone, and there was nothing but an open window and curtains blowing in the wind.

Outside the clouds cleared up. The place where she had touched me was burning.

She had been here, I swore it. She could have been a ghost, but she was still so solid…so _real. _She had a soft touch like sunlight on my face, and her whole form seemed to radiate in sight and in comfort. I wanted her to stay forever, and yet the few seconds she had given me with her now were enough to last a lifetime.

Her image was still engrained in my head. She was slipping away, and had slipped away from me so quickly that I hadn't had time to realize that I would probably never be with her again, never tell her what I felt. She would never again hold me in her arms or watch me grow up, never watch me fall in love, never be there to see my kids if I had any…No flesh wound could ever take away that anguish.

I closed my eyes, grabbed the blade again and still tried anyway.

*

Oh no. There was a problem here. A really big problem. The wound wouldn't stop bleeding. I pressed tissue paper into the wound but the red just seeped it up. There would be no antibacterial gel or band aids to stem this one. I grabbed a towel, but the puce color soon turned red enough that you could have sworn that was the way we bought it. _If a wound is bleeding immensely, don't remove the cloth from it. Keep applying pressure, _my father's voice sounded in my head. I followed his advice and kept my good hand on the wound, coming out of the bathroom and not caring if I dripped all over the rug.

"Dad," I called, my voice strained.

"What is it kiddo?" he called from the other room, unaware of my impending panic. I looked in the mirror next to me and saw that my face was growing more and more pale. My walking seemed sort of off.

"You'd better come look at this," I said. I heard the furniture creak from the other room and waited…my gosh how long was it going to take for him to get out here?!

My childish instinct took over at last. "Daddy!" I finally cried. He wasn't moving fast enough, he wasn't _moving! _I was going to die here, alone, of my own ridiculous pride and fear. My sister came out of the other room at my voice and saw me; she grabbed my arm in fright once she saw the bleeding.

"What did you do?" she asked, very scared.

"Don't leave," I begged her. More than ever, I needed her here.

"I'm not going anywhere. Just breathe," she told me. She applied her own pressure to the wound and yelled, "Dad, we need you _now!" _

"I'm coming, I'm coming," he complained. "You kids are always asking…" his voice trailed away at the sight of me. He himself almost lost the color from his face and he asked, "What happened?"

"Cut too deep," I winced. He moaned and said, "Well don't panic-"

"Panicking!" I screamed. He grabbed me and said, "Steady! It's not as bad as it looks, it's just bleeding a lot. Stay here,"

He sat me down in a chair and went to get the first aid kit. Yin leaned against the wall and asked, "I'll never understand you. What was it this time?"

"I'm your brother. You're not supposed to understand me," I said. My breathing was elevated as I tried to keep calm. "It was about mother. I saw her."

"Hallucinations!" she yelped. "This just keeps getting worse!"

I went to bite back a reply but before I could Dad came in carrying a plastic box. He set it on the ground and took out a large gauze pad. He took off the towel, placed the pad on the wound, and began wrapping it up tightly with a bandage. He took white medical tape, bound it shut, and held it firmly for a few minutes until he was sure that the bleeding had stopped.

"You won't need the hospital, but we should keep an eye on it," he said before looking at me directly. "And more than that, I think we should keep a closer eye on you."

"I wasn't trying to kill myself, honest," I said.

"Then what were you trying to do?" he asked. He sounded very tired, and I once again was filled with regret. But this time, however, it was different. There was a flash of anger behind there, and a bitter voice inside my head snapped, _What, too much to care for me?_ I felt stung by that sound; I had never heard my inner voice be so brash.

Yin pointed. "He's having hallucinations! He says he saw mother!"

"I did see her!" I protested. "She was standing right in front of me! She touched my face, then left out the wall…"

"Out the wall?" My dad repeated. The look on his face gave me another flash of anger…what was wrong with me?

"I'm not crazy," I said, a desperate attempt to rein in my out of control mind.

"Nobody said you were," Dad said quickly. I could read his mind now. He was afraid of upsetting me again. He clapped me on the shoulder and said, "Just take it easy. Dinner will be ready in a minute." He left me there and I got up from the chair slowly, shaking.

"I saw her," I whispered after him.

Yin hugged me. "It's okay bro, I sometimes imagine that she's here too…"

"But I wasn't imagining things," I whispered. "She was right in front of me."

"Our mind can make us think that," she whispered back. "I know how it feels. I really do. But I'm worried about you. I'm scared what could happen to you. You're not well."

"I know I'm not." I said. She was making me believe her now. I couldn't have really seen Mom. I had been cutting the second before I saw her. She had walked through the wall, for crying out loud! The rationale didn't add up.

"Let's go eat," she said, letting me go. "You've got to be weak by now."

"I am pretty hungry," I admitted. It felt nice to be taken care of. I followed her into the kitchen but someone grabbed my arm: I turned to look into Rain's eyes. By the look of them, she had watched the whole thing silently and out of sight.

"I don't agree with what she says," Rain said. "But I do believe you. I think you did see your mother and maybe…I may be able to prove it."

"What are you talking about Rain? You know the truth as well as I do. I'm imagining things," I groaned.

"No you're not. You're a Prince of Pakavel," she said, very strained.

"And what difference does that make?" I asked. During our stay with my grandmother Rain had learned of our previous royalty status. I didn't see how it made a difference, but the instant she found out she made a really big deal out of it, calling me, "My liege," and things like that. It was only until I had commanded her to act like my equal that she was that she started being my, I mean, our, Rain.

"That was Trinity, it must have been!" she whispered faster and louder.

"Rain, you need to calm down too," I said. There was the lost Rain I was talking about. She didn't know anything about the world. "I know it must have freaked you out a few minutes ago, but after dinner we'll clean up all the blood and everything will be alright again."

She backed up, shaking her head. "You don't get it, do you? Fine. Then I'll have to make you understand." She let out a growl and before I could blink my eyes a snow white leopard was standing there, her teeth bared before she charged out the front door with a bang. A ripped black dress was all that was left in her place.


	4. We Lose Our Protection

Ouch. That cut really hurt…

My wrist was throbbing. I winced once more as we cleaned up the kitchen. Once we were done my Dad said, "You two. Over here." We followed him into the living room where he sat down on the lounge chair and we sat down on the couch.

He looked around. "Where's Rain? This is important. I need to tell her this too. Why wasn't she at dinner?"

I ran my fingers over the bandage. "She ran off. She'll be back though, I think she just went into town."

"It's not safe for her to be out there alone," Dad said, looking out.

"Believe me, she can take care of herself," My sister said, leaning back on the cushions. "What is it you wanted to tell us?"

Dad looked at me a very long time before speaking. I inwardly squirmed under that deep purple gaze…I could make myself have that look too, if I glared into the mirror long enough. Finally he opened his mouth. "I have to go away for a few days, and no, I can't take you with me," he said to Yin's open mouth. "I'll be going through some dangerous country, and I have to travel alone. Condolet is no place for kids these days,"

"You're going to Condolet?" Yin asked, her face bright with jealousy. Obsessive with anything to do with our heritage, Condolet was the country of our father's birthplace.

"Yes. It's not because I want to, I have to. Ever since Eradicus was kil-gone from Pakavel," he stuttered, catching my eye, "Condolet has been set free as well. They want a new ruler, and they think as the previous duke I'm the man for the job."

"Are you?" I asked.

"Of course not!" he flung his hands out. "I hate politics! Why do you think I left the place so easily? I'm too old, too weary, and I have you guys and Rain to provide for. I can barely do that halfway properly, let alone run a country."

"You're not that terrible," I said, rolling my eyes.

"So says my son, who was bleeding all over the floor not a half an hour ago," he said gently.

"My cutting is my own fault, not yours," I snapped.

"All the same," Yin said, breaking up the conversation. "Why can't we go?"

"There will be people there wanting to fight me for it," he said. "I would let them have it, of course, if they weren't all as crooked as they come. I'm only there until I pick someone who can do the job right. Besides," he said. "The people of Pakavel may have forgotten that I am your father, but Condolet has not. The answer is no."

My sister began to pout. I honestly didn't care; I wasn't in the mood for tangling with people right now. Maybe go and hit some stuff later, perhaps, to get my anger out, but I did not want an Eradicus-repeat.

"So we're staying here alone then?" Yin asked.

"Um…no." Yin opened her mouth in outrage and I jolted up from my seat. "I've decided that you need an adult to watch over you and make sure you're safe. I've called in a favor and found an old friend, Elena. She'll make sure you guys are alright while I'm gone."

"You're only making this woman come because you want somebody to make sure he doesn't kill himself," Yin pointed at me.

"No, Yin, it's not just because of that…"

"Excuse me? I have to be watched now?" I asked.

"Yes, you do," Dad said. "Obviously."

There was a silence in which I simmered. Dad leaned forward and said, "Listen to me. I can't leave three kids, especially one I don't know very well, unsupervised. The city would be on my rear in a heartbeat if they found out and it's too dangerous. Anybody could come in here."

I could see by his face that he wasn't lying, and I believed him. It was too dangerous to be alone. Yet I was still struck by the whole, 'watch him before he hurts himself again' thing. The truth is what hurts the most.

"I'll be leaving tomorrow, before you wake up," he said. "It's best if you don't know what direction I'm going. Now get to bed. It's late enough as it is."

"We just ate," Yin mumbled.

"At nine o clock at night. Bed. Now." He said.

"What about Rain?" I said, looking at him

"I'll wait up for her. If she doesn't come home in the next ten minutes I'll go looking for her."

We both groaned and headed away. As I was at the window before the door however, somebody came tumbling into the window and right into me.

Yin leapt aside and I looked up to see Rain, fully clothed, with wild branches tangled in her hair and water on her face. She was lying on top of me and looking quite frustrated.

"Rain! Where exactly have you been?" My dad asked, coming over and pulling her off of me.

"Here and there, and nowhere in-between," she heaved, shaking the water out of her hair.

"What?" Dad asked, looking confused.

"Uptown," she responded simply. Dad looked at her and said, "Rain, you just can't take off like that. Anything could have happened."

"But it did not, and would not," She looked at all of us in turn, then at me. I noticed that she looked at me the longest, and my cheeks burned. "Goodnight everyone."

She went into her own room and shut the door. There was the silence that Rain always seemed to leave behind her, then Yin grabbed my wrist without the bandage and said, "Alright then, I guess we'll go to bed too. Have a nice night Dad." She then pulled me into the room, shut the door, and flung herself onto her bed.

"What's with you? You never go to sleep this early," I said.

She gave me a look. "I'm not going to bed. I'm going to do some research, see where he's going."

"You're not thinking of _following _him, are you?" I groaned.

"Why not?" a devilish smile lit up her face.

"You're ridiculous," I said. "We can't tag along and you know it. Just sit back and let Dad do his job. Maybe this Elena will be able to teach us a thing or two while she's here."

"We could have been left alone if you hadn't of pulled that little stunt," She hissed.

"Well sorry! I tried…"

"You did not. I know it."

I looked down. "You're right, I didn't."

The quiet reined once more. She tore her eyes away from the books she was reading and asked, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine now."

"I mean your wrist."

"It's throbbing, but besides that…"

She looked back at her notes and maps. There was a knock on the door and Dad came in again, carrying two glasses of what looked like warm milk.

"I um…I thought you guys would want something to drink before you went to bed. You know, to calm you down because I'm leaving." He said. He looked anxious and was floundering; something was off about him.

"We're not little kids Dad. We're not going to freak out because you're gone…at least I won't." She said in a snappish voice. I gave her a hurtful glare; she could be so mean.

"You're little to me," he smiled. He handed us the glasses. My sister drank it down instantly, to get him off her back and make her leave quicker. I however, looked inside.

A strangely sweet smell was rising up from the milk, making it seem even more delicious than it was. I looked in and smiled; Dad knew Yin was trying to follow him. He had magicked the milk to make us sleep longer so he could make a clean getaway.

Yin's eyes were suddenly drooping. All thought of researching forgotten, she climbed under the covers and yawned. "I think I'll drop off now," she said. "I can…follow…morning…"

She was out. Dad looked at me expectantly and I said, "So did you give Rain some too? She ought to sleep really good tonight."

"Actually, I did." He said. He was still waiting. With a smile and a wink I downed the whole glass in one gulp. Exhaustion instantly came over me and I began automatically moving to the bed. Dad brought down the covers and I climbed in, saying, "Thanks for the drink. I ought to be out all night long, after all the work you put into it. Did you add some healing too, to fix up my wrist?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," he mumbled, and my head hit the pillow.

I laughed as he shuffled out the door. "Nice trick on the milk," I said. "You're going to have to teach me that sometime." At that I fell asleep.

*

The next morning I felt as if I had been sleeping on Cloud 9. It was a wonderful, warm feeling, and I was very refreshed. I rose in bed and saw a surprise; fresh bandages on my wrist. Dad must have changed them before he left. I looked at it and smiled; yep, he sure did make sure to add healing to my drink. Even though he couldn't heal wounds very well at all, the throbbing was gone and it felt a little smaller.

Yin had her arms crossed and was leaning on the wall. She didn't look at me while saying, "He drugged the milk, didn't he?"

"Magicked it, actually." I said. "If you weren't so intent on getting him out of the room maybe you would have noticed."

"Why did you drink it?" she asked, turning her head.

"To make him happy. I needed a long night of rest." I said.

I slid out of bed and she sighed. After we got dressed we headed into the hall, where a very confused Rain was standing.

"What's wrong?" My sister asked.

"There's nobody here," Rain said, looking around. "We slept until near noon, and when your father came in with my drink last night, he told me a woman would come. There is no woman."

"Maybe she's late." Yin wondered.

"I don't know," I said. "Wasn't Dad supposed to make sure she was here before he took off?"

"I think so," Yin said. The three of us crept together throughout the house, but it was empty.

"Ah well. She's not here," Yin brightened. "Let's go and get some breakfast."

"You mean lunch," Rain corrected.

"Brunch," I said finally. "After that we'll just sit down and wait. She has to show eventually."

*

The next day we were still all alone. The house was a mess; the three of us unsupervised had gone pretty wild without an adult. We had a lot of fun, at least.

Yet the silence from the outside world was making us all uneasy. There had been no phone call from anyone, no visitors. You would think my Dad would call to check up every once in a while. We couldn't go outside, so we were chained up in the house.

"Something about this isn't right," Rain said later, after we finished up yet another movie marathon. "I can sense it."

"You're just extra jumpy," Yin said. She had been the calmest so far, yet now her uneasiness was beginning to show. "So she didn't come. So what? Dad will make it back and we can tell him she never arrived."

I kept silent. I was like a sentry, looking after both girls while trying to keep my own curiosity and wariness under control. I got up and began pacing back and forth, trying to sort out my thoughts.

"Let's summarize," I said. "Dad will be gone for who knows how long, he hasn't called, the person he hired to look after us hasn't showed up, and we don't know where either of them are," My pacing grew quicker, faster.

"Did he abandon us? After all, he did magic the milk," Rain shivered. Her eyes were fearful and wide as she remembered all the past times people had left her. She was so bad about it now that she believed it was only me that would never leave her…

My sister and I locked eyes. Dad, abandon us? Just get up and leave? There were lots of stories about fathers who left their kids, but not ours. That couldn't happen to us. Had he finally gotten tired of looking out for us?

"No." I said loudly and abruptly. I would not expect that possibility. "He wouldn't do that to us."

"Then maybe he's hurt then. Maybe something went wrong." Yin's voice was high pitched.

"All this worrying isn't going to do us any good," I said strictly. "We'll just tough it out a few more days and soon we'll know we're all acting silly. We have nothing to be frightened about…"

Yin made a very small, scared noise, cutting me off. She raised her finger and pointed, while Rain was as stiff as a statue, like a deer who knows that at any minute it will be hunted. I slowly turned to see a tall, cloaked figure at the end of the room, her head bowed menacingly while her hood cast her face in shadow. I knew it was a female by the way she was standing, and by the shape of her body. How she got in was a mystery; all the windows and doors were locked. Could this be Elena? But no…there was something about this figure that made me know instantly that this was not our missing sitter.

There was something odd about her…something that plucked at my heartstrings and scared half the life out of me. I knew this figure was the strongest warrior I had ever seen in my lifetime, stronger than my Dad and Eradicus put together. We didn't stand a chance.

The masked marauder lifted her pale, delicate hand up in the air. It started glowing with a power that was treacherous, uncontrollable. Everything seemed to be in slow motion as Rain screamed to run. Yin grabbed my hand and tried pulling me out of the way. We began to bolt out of the room but I knew it was useless; whomever the assassin was aiming for, she surely wouldn't miss.


	5. Marked

"Move!" I shouted. I pushed the girls down on the floor just as a orb of green hit above our heads and caused a fan to fall from the ceiling and a wardrobe to collapse, blocking our exit. We all let out screams of pain as bruises began to spring on our thighs. Our legs had gotten trapped under them both and we tried to escape, though it was futile. That had been her plan all along; not to hit us, but to pin us down. We struggled, but the fan and the wardrobe, along with all the stuff inside of it, was very heavy. Too heavy for three kids to lift when they were under it themselves.

"I'll get us out of here! Destruct!" Yin shouted, and she pointed her fingers at the objects. It was a bad move on her part though; both shattered and the pieces blew in many directions, and one piece cut Rain across the cheek. We managed to tear away at the last minute before the intruder made her way over to us.

Rain had one hand across her cheek where she had been hit. I grabbed her and led her blindly as things shattered above our heads. My sword! Where was it, I always carried it with me…I saw it lying propped up against the wall and I grabbed it, whirling around and repelling her magic fire with my weapon.

Suddenly everything seemed to change. The shaded woman lifted her arms and the room around us grew wavy, as if in a dream. It was melting away around us. I saw the ground beneath my feet start to run, then I began sinking as if in quicksand. I yelled, then a blue force field sprang up around me.

Yin was trying her best to keep reality in and the woman's trickery out. "I can't hold it alone! I need help!" She screamed. I grabbed her hand, with Rain's still in my other, and all three of us pressed on the field with our minds.

It was tough going. We had never met a force this strong. There should have been nothing that could stand up to our combined mental powers, but this lady made it seem like all our training was just simply games. At that moment all three of us knew that our power was failing; the woman had only toyed with us this far because she didn't want to waste too much energy. In an instant, she would wink her eye and we would all cease to exist.

Sweat was pouring from our faces. We hit the ground on our knees and Yin choked, "Don't break the connection…if we do…we're doomed…"

"We're doomed anyway!" Rain spat, the one hand now splattered with red. She didn't seem to realize the immensity of the situation, and was still mad at Yin for causing her to bleed. I opened my eyes and looked out of the field, out at the woman; when I saw her face I got an idea.

"Break through her defenses on three! She's got too much of an offense to protect herself!" I said. "One, two, three!"

At the same time we hurled our invisible auras out of the shield and at the woman. She was flung back, and it as if I went rushing at her; I went inside her mind, and what I saw confused me…

Any minute now their defenses would break. They were just children, they didn't know of the world and what it could do. Soon she would be reunited with her little ones and she would hold them in her arms again…her darling ones…

The figure ran for it. We dropped our shield, too weak to do anymore. She didn't come back and we finally got up, checking all the doors and windows to make sure they had indeed been locked. They were.

"Well that was dumb," Yin said. "She has us in her grasp, and she goes running when we look inside her mind?"

"I'm not complaining," Rain said, a large bandage now across her face. "Are you?"

I stepped in-between the two of them before a catfight broke out. "Look, guys, don't argue. We just chased her out. Now we have to make sure we keep her out."

"What makes you so sure she's coming back?" Yin asked, irritated.

"Because she wouldn't have been here in the first place. You saw her, the only reason she broke is because she knows something she doesn't want us to find out. Which means that we have something she wants. She'll be back."

"That's so reassuring," Yin said. She looked around. "Should we clean up the mess?"

I shook my head. "We may need to use the broken stuff as weapons if she breaks in again."

"Try calling your Dad," Rain said. "Right now."

A big "Duh" moment hit me there. Dad had a cell phone, so why hadn't we thought of calling him earlier? I got my own phone out and dialed the number quickly. All I got was his voicemail. "Hey Dad, it's me. You really need to call us back. Someone tried to break in and the house is trashed, and Elena never showed up. When you get this call us right now."

I hung up. We all looked at each other and I said, "We should barricade everything. It doesn't matter if the place is messed up now. We just have to remain safe."

A few hours later Yin tried calling Dad. She hung up almost immediately and said, "The operator told me the phone's dead. He either forgot to charge it or he left it behind somewhere."

This was just too creepy, too planned. It wasn't a test, it wasn't a drill. This was real. As night began to fall we all gravitated towards each other naturally. We hadn't done anything in the past couple hours except talk about the intruder and huddle in the living room. We got what we needed to eat from the kitchen and went to the bathroom in groups. It seemed amazing to me that my own house had become a trap.

As the night grew longer it demanded sleep. Our eyelids drooped and I said, "Do you think we should take turns watching out while the others sleep?"

"Sure," Rain yawned. I was in the middle of the couch and both girls were on either side of me, and we were wrapped up in a big blanket that could be flung off easily if attacked.

"I'll take the first one, then Rain, then you," I said to Yin. She nodded. The two girls leaned against me and fell asleep. Outside I could almost sear a shape moved; though it was probably my imagination

*

Needless to say, none of us slept well that night. I had my hand on the hilt of my sword the entire time and my hand was sore. But our aches, however, were nothing compared to what awaited us in the morning.

"Our faces!" Yin screamed. She pointed in the mirror and we saw that there were three bright red kiss marks on our foreheads, in the most ravishing red lipstick. Rain's cut was healed completely, and there was a feminine scent that seemed to hover around the room.

"She was in here," Rain whispered. "Despite all our precautions she managed to sneak in, catch us when we weren't on watch. But she didn't mean us harm…unless this mark is a warning."

"Marking us as victims, her prey," Yin shivered. "She _is _going to come back…again. So what are we going to do? Nothing we have achieved has kept her out, except for the mind attack, and she won't fall for that twice."

"We've gotta leave," I said. "We don't have a choice."

There was a silence as this proposition hovered. "What about Dad?" Yin asked softly.

I shook my head. "We can't wait around for him anymore," I said. "It's dangerous here. He's skilled enough that he can track us down but we're not skilled enough to completely defend ourselves. We need to find a safe place."

A light bulb lit up in my sister's eyes. She pulled out a map from the bookcase propped up against a door, spread it out and pointed to a red dot. "This is a safe house. If we can reach here we'll have enough supplies to keep us going and Dad should know where to look. It's really secluded. Whoever is after us will have a hard time trying to find out where we are, and it's only about an hour's walk."

"Will we be able to make it there if she's tracking us, though?" Rain asked. "And how do we know se doesn't have…as you say…friends?"

Yin shrugged. "Either make a break for it or be a sitting duck."

"I say we run. Now." I grabbed both their hands and pulled them towards the door, tipping the bookcase over and bolting across the yard for the safety of the trees.

_Hi hi! So I would really like some feedback, if possible, so I can know what you guys think of the story. How do you like Rain and the plot so far? How is Yang coping with his problem? Theories? Anything is good, I would just like your honest opinion on how it is coming so I can plot even deeper for the next chapters. Thanks! ___


	6. A Familiar Melody

"My feet hurt!" Sis complained. We were about halfway to the hideout, and the walk was taking a lot longer than we had all thought.

I sighed, pulling my shoes through the squelching mud. "I know, but we have to keep moving. Hopefully this swamp is slowing our tracker down just as much as its slowing us down."

"I wouldn't count on it," Rain said. She changed into a snow leopard, her clothes so baggy that she actually didn't tear them off. We had taken to buying them that way now so she would still have them once she changed in and out. She clawed up a tree and peered around, her head swiveling from left to right.

"See anything?" I asked. She growled and shook her head, knocking down a large branch. She splattered us all with swamp goo.

"Ugh!" Yin said. "I've had enough!" she hovered above the ground and traveled that way, sparing herself the trouble. Rain herself swung from tree to tree. Unable to do either, I was stuck with dealing with the yucky squishiness.

We were tired, hungry, and driven from our home, so would the dumb safe house just appear already and get it over with? I had almost lost hope, until I saw a vine covered hut in the distance.

"Hooray! We've made it," Yin said. She started hovering faster towards the hut, until she screeched to a halt. She wavered a bit in midair, and was about to fall out of it. When I saw what was below her I grabbed her, and pulled her back to where I was. I looked down to a great obstacle.

Inbetween us and the house was a massive pit, and I'm not talking about no sandbox. This chasm was hundreds of feet deep, and the safe house sat in the middle of the canyon with ten feet of ground on each side. You couldn't walk around it, as it dropped off on all sides.

"Well isn't this just lovely," I said, Rain transforming and becoming a girl beside me. "Thanks Dad, we made it to the place. Now can you help us to actually _get over there?"_

"We have to cross the gap," Rain pointed. "There's no other way."

Yin turned to her slowly. "No dip Sherlock. I can't levitate you guys, you're too heavy. Got any bright ideas?"

I knew Yin was frustrated, but there was no reason to talk to Rain like that. But before I could utter a retort Rain smiled and said, "Yes, actually, yes I do." She went over to the trees, ripped down a long and sturdy vine, and coiled it up. She tied one end several times around a tree. "You take this end," She tossed it over to Yin, "And hover over to the other side. Then Yang will crawl across the rope and I will follow."

Already I hated this plan. My life depended on how well a tree and my sister held the rope. Not that I couldn't trust my sis, but that was one heck of a drop…

"You're not serious," Yin said. She had turned quite pale, and she suddenly started squeezing the life out of me with her arms.

"Got a better idea?" Rain asked. She pointed up at the sky and as if on cue, lightning flashed across it.

"A thunderstorm," I mumbled. Just our luck. I looked to the two girls and said, "Don't let me drop."

Yin nodded, then hovered over to the other side as calmly as she could. She held the rope taught, using a boulder as a bracer. Rain tied the knot around the tree tighter and nodded; I gulped and started sliding across.

Crapola. This was scary. I tried to remember not to close my eyes and shuffled across, keeping my vision to the sky instead of the pit. Inch by inch, row by row…

When I was crawling, my head suddenly felt very light. My gaze swarmed and I wondered how scared could I be, but the light was starting to black out and things were starting to change.

"Oh man, oh man, what's going on?" I asked, but before I could register what was happening the sky above me went away. I was in a different place, and watching as if from above.

_An old man sat on a stone bench, his head bowed and looking exhausted. A beautiful woman clasped her hands in front of her as if giving an offering and tried not to sigh._

_"We can't go on like this, Trinity," the man spoke. "The enemy is going to attack or the kingdom's going to collapse. I've been fighting for so long…I don't know if I can fight anymore."_

_Trinity moved closer. "Then I'll fight for you."_

"_No!" he protested, raising his head. "Terrence was right! I put you in danger, in trouble, over and over! You've had such a hard life and you've worked so hard to get where you are now…"_

"_And what is wrong with that?" She asked, strength in her voice. "Why would a little more difficulty kill me?  
_

"_Because we both know you can't keep up," Yomen said sadly. "Us being together puts too much at risk."_

"_Are you divorcing me?" Trinity asked, her hands clenched._

"_Not because I want to! Everyday I pine for you, wish to make you mine again and again! But I can't stand the looks of your peoples faces, and the criticism of my own…"_

"_A coward then. You can take down soldiers a plenty but when questioned by your own subjects you flobber like a fish," Trinity hissed. _

"_You don't think I don't know what they say about you?" he stood up, now angry too. "If anything, it is more for your honor than my own! I need to keep you safe, and I can't do that if your people disrespect you!"_

"_Maybe the rumors about me are true," she said sharply._

_There was a silence. "Trin, you didn't."_

_She was quiet. "It doesn't matter. Yomen," she whispered. "I'd rather give the crown away and become Eradicus' own slave a thousand times over, as long as I still loved you."_

_Yomen's face softened. He walked forward and held her for a long time, two lovers caught between two countries, two sides, two lives._

_Suddenly Yomen jumped back from their embrace. He looked down to her stomach; she removed a long cloak to show something nobody else had yet seen; a small bump._

_Yomen was open mouthed. "I felt a kick…you're not?"_

_Trinity nodded. "Ready or not…" she hushed, tears in her eyes. _

_Yomen couldn't believe it. "How? When? Is it mine?" _

_Trinity rolled her eyes. "No, it's the cook's. Of course it's yours! And as for the how and when, I'm pretty sure you can figure it out."_

_Yomen ran a hand through his hair. "How far along are you?"_

"_Not very. A month, maybe more."_

_Yomen pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms around her shoulders. "Oh Trin…" he whispered._

"_He's going to be beautiful, you know," she whispered. "Just like you."_

"_How do you know it's a boy? I think it's a girl," he replied. _

"_I just know, alright?" she laughed. "So you're not mad?"_

"_Mad?" he asked. "I'm ecstatic! A kid…"_

"_You were never the one to seem like you wanted children," Trinity put in._

_He shook his head. "No, I wasn't. I never planned on it. But now…I'll help you Trinity. We'll figure it out. Our little princess-"_

"_Prince," Trinity interrupted._

"_Will be the most lovely child in the land. I love you," he said, smiling._

_She leaned into him. "Not as much as I could love you."_

My vision swarmed once again…I saw a flicker of the sky and it was gone…

_A baby was crying somewhere nearby in the background. The color in Yomen's face was beginning to return; at the sound of the child, he seemed to be electrified. Trinity laid in the bed in pain._

_The only midwife there handed a wrapped bundle over to Yomen. "It's a boy," she said, her smile beaming._

_Yomen looked like you could hit him with a hammer and he wouldn't care. "A boy…" he whispered. He looked at the baby, its eyes still closed. A tuft of brown hair was on its small head. "You were right, honey." He said, obviously already in love with the baby._

_"Told you," Trinity gritted her teeth. Yet something was wrong. She was breathing as if still in labor, squeezing her hands so hard that all the blood filtered out of them._

_The midwife checked her over and gasped in surprise. "There's another one coming."_

_"What?" Yomen asked. His voice rose to a high squeak._

_"She's having another one," the helper said. She pointed over to a chair and said, "Sit your butt down and hold your son while I help Trinity."_

_Yomen did as he was told. Trinity gasped and said, "This one's coming a lot quicker than its brother." She screamed and Yomen nearly leapt up, if not for the baby in his hands._

_A few minutes passed, but it seemed like days. Finally there was a extremely loud wailing, and a baby a bit smaller than the first was wrapped in a tiny pink blanket._

_"You did it honey," Yomen said in awe_

_Trinity smiled, obviously very tired. "Was there any doubt? We're going to have to go to another land, stage their birth in a hospital or something…"_

_Yomen knelt down and put the first baby in her left arm, and the midwife put the other in her right. The midwife put her hands on her hips and said, "You know what this means, don't you?"_

"_No," Trinity said, still harshly but soft enough so it didn't disturb the twins. "I won't have them being dragged into a war that's not their responsibility. I'll hide them."_

_"As long as one of them doesn't have blue eyes, we should be okay," The midwife said. "The elders are waiting for one with blue eyes." All of them hovered over the babies in anticipation, waiting for them to open their eyes._

_The boy was first. His small lids opened and they all breathed a sigh of relief as they saw their color; his father's deep violet._

_"Come on baby," Trinity whispered to the girl. The unnamed child seemed to stir; then, with a sudden vibrancy she looked up and they all glimpsed her sapphire orbs of light._

_The twins saw each other for the first time, and it was love at first sight._

"What are you doing?" My sister was shouting. I opened my eyes to see that a few moments had passed, raindrops lighting upon my face. "Get over here now!"

My vision had come when I was climbing right in the middle of the rope. Now back to reality, I let go of my vice like cling and shimmed across the rest of the way.

"What's wrong with you?" Yin asked, looking at me. I shook my head and tried to wave away the thoughts inside my head. Steadying myself I grabbed the rope and yelled, "Never mind! Rain, let's go!"

I had just watched my mother giving birth, not exactly something that I had wanted to see. I focused my attention on Rain coming across, intent on getting her over here safely. She made it across way faster then I did and got down, grabbing the rope from us. "Go untie it," she instructed Yin. Yin hovered back over yet again, untied the rope from the tree and hovered back. Rain coiled up the rope and said, "Now nobody can follow us."

"Hopefully," I said. I went to the house door and found it unlocked; we pushed open the door and found supplies of all kinds inside, including couches to sleep on and an upstairs with a bunch of boxes.

"Looks like Dad used this place as a storage area instead of a hideout," I mumbled. I kicked aside an old music box and it opened. On its side, a familiar tune began humming out of it.

All three of us looked at each other. "I know this song," Rain said, stepping forward towards the box.

"So do I," Yin said.

"So do I," I added. I now regretted kicking it aside. A tune struck up and Yin began to sing. Rain joined in, and eventually, so did I. Our voices rose together and created a harmony, the most lovely song I had heard in a long time.

"_Be brave, little one._

_So much life has in store for you. _

_You will fight for love,_

_And loss,_

_And pain,_

_Yet I will see you through._

_Be wise, new one. _

_You are my ever light._

_My shining star at night. _

_There's a glow inside of you._

_Be strong, young one. _

_Destiny awaits you now._

_And though I'm not by your side,_

_Think of me,_

_And I will never be far away."_

The music ended. I bent down to pick it up. Whatever it was, it held a special meaning for all of us, and though we didn't know why, it was sticking with us now. We took it downstairs and left the attic, going to place it on the kitchen counter. We played it often.

Once we all saw something outside our window across the pit, but the music was playing, and it seemed to scare the shape away. It was probably an animal, but now we had an even greater reason to adore the box.

We found out that our cell phones still worked all the way out here. Before we fell asleep I tried calling Dad's cell again. Even though I knew it was disconnected, I hoped that he had managed to somehow get it back on.

The phone rang and rang, but he didn't answer.

_Here you are! Please review, especially on the song and about Rain (I still haven't gotten any reviews about her yet, so I have no idea if people love her or hate her). But really, I don't care. Just leave me your thoughts. I'm going to be doing National Novel Writing Month this November and I don't know if I'll have time to write for this, but I'll try! _


	7. A Family Affair

_In dreams the darkness is as deep as my mind; it swallows me up until I am consumed by it, frightened and confused, backed into one corner. _

_I see myself, the part I hate almost as much as I hate the pitiful me, bear down on me ten feet away with burning red eyes. His teeth are sharp and bared, smiling at me as he draws near._

"_Coward," he spits. "Frustration and anger rule over you now, don't they? Run away, stupid little weakling, run away. Run away like you always do." _

"_I'm not going anywhere," I say. My voice quivers but I still hold what little ground I have. _

"_I'll make you," he says. "It's not hard to make you do anything. You're so gullible, and too easily hurt. You let your emotions take charge and have no idea how to handle them. I've never seen such a big woos in my life. Such a pushover, so easy to sway, so easy to brainwash,"_

"_I stand up for what I believe!" I shout back at him. "I believe in me!"_

_He ignores me. "People would walk all over you," he said, and I realize he has taken on my sister's voice. "They walk all over you now."_

"_So?" I mumble. He grins and says in a voice too much like Rain's, "You cry too much. What's the matter, can't hold it in? Can't be strong enough as the rest of us to fight back?"_

"_No!" I protest. _

_He slaps me across the face, exactly the way Yin slapped me a few months before. "Fight back! Fight back you coward! Make it bleed, make it bleed!" _

"_No!"_

"_Prove you are brave! Don't run away! Do it now!" he commands. _

_I hurl my fist at him, and his form shatters. I realize that all that was threatening me was a mirror. _

_*_

I slowly stir from one of the bedrooms in the safe house. I am still disoriented by the terrible nightmare. I've been attacked by my own mind, again and again. I'm still the same, I haven't changed. Not happy in either place. Just…helpless.

There are three beds in here, so Rain, Sis and I all can sleep in the same place, tripling our safety. I am the first one up, which is a surprise; Rain is an early riser.

I slump back against the pillows and check out my latest bandage. It should be able to come off today, and is probably fully healed. With extra bandages nearby in case I am wrong, I slowly unwrap the wound. I am pleased to find out that I no longer need bandages. All there is on my wrist is a long, fresh scar.

I roll up my sleeves and look at the rest of them. I've been clean since Dad left, but it seems that scars heal far less quickly then what was expected. They lace back and forth up my arm, crisscrossing, mad and angry…

Some are old and thin. The recent ones are red and itchy. They're all starting to fade…with a jolt I realize that I've been cutting for nine months, and it was one year and one week ago that I started finding ways to cause myself pain. I turn over on my side and observe the pain…I wonder what Dad would say if he were here right now.

_Dad,_ I say in my head. _Where are you? What happened? Why can't we get a hold of you, why did nothing you said that would happen worked out? _

I sit up in bed and wrap my arms around my legs. Sis stirs in the bed next to mine and sees my face. She sits up and asks, "What's wrong?"

I shake my head. "I just want to know where Dad got off to,"

"Me too," she yawns. She rises up out of bed and says, "Come on. Let's go make some breakfast."

We troop downstairs and ruffle through the cupboards, looking for food. Rain eventually emerges, looking sort of scared and frightened.

"What's wrong?" I ask, putting down a jar of jam.

She shakes her head. "My dreams were full of dark, and shadow. The masked woman chased and chased us, and we did not get away. She struck you down…" Rain covered her eyes with her hands.

"Hey, hey," I say, and drift close to her. I put my arms around her and say, "It was only a dream. A very bad and horrible dream."

"No, no, twere not a dream, it was real!" she moaned, and she's actually crying now.

"It was a dream, Rain," Yin says, and she wraps her arms around her too. "Nothing bad is going to happen. We're safe now, just the three of us."

Rain whispers harshly in Latin, quickly and rapidly. Once she calms down my heritage kicks in and I can somewhat make out what she's saying; Yin, by the look on her face, can understand everything that was said.

"We should talk strictly in Latin now," Yin says. "That way if there is someone listening in it's unlikely that they will understand what is said."

I nod, even though my Latin is really bad. "But how long?" I ask, wincing. Ouch, that was terrible. Horrible pronunciation.

Rain replies in the Pakavelian tongue. "For as long as possible. How many days has it been since we have arrived here?"

Yin shakes her head. "At least five. I've lost count of the sunsets."

We are silent. There's a knock at the door and all of us jump; Yin whispers, "Get down!" and we fling ourselves to the floor. Rain slowly takes off her clothes and transforms into a snow leopard, teeth bared. Yin has her magic out, and ties her hair back quickly under the table. I am crouched against a wall, on the side of the door, with one hand on my sword. I always carry it around with me these days.

I put a finger to my lips and wait for the count. Yin slowly nods once and I fling open the door. All three of us charge at once, sword, magic and fang.

There's a wild yell and we all pause in shock. A force field bounces us back and we are tossed to the floor. Yin and I look up at the same time to see the astonished face of our father.

"What the heck was all that?" he asks.

Yin grabs his hand and pulls him inside quickly. Rain begins locking and checking all the windows and doors, still in leopard form; I pull down the shades and I sit on the couch next to my dad, who has taken a seat.

When the panic is over the girls are breathing just as hard as I am. Dad looks at us in concern and I ask hurtfully, "Where have you been! We've been calling you, over and over, for days!"

"Why are you talking in Latin?" he asked, confused.

"Because we've been chased and have been in hiding for days!" Yin's Latin is rapid fire and harsh. "A masked woman came to the house and we had to flee, or do you think we just came here for a vacation! The woman you hired never showed up, by the way,"

Dad nodded, responding himself in the language. "I realized that. Do you know how terrified I was when I found the place trashed and you missing? It was a very good thing that you left a trail, because I was about ready to file all three of you kidnapped."

"We left a trail?" I asked.

"A very large one. It was easy to follow," he said.

We looked at each other. If we had left such a big path, why hadn't the assassin captured us already? No doubt she could levitate over the large gulch like Dad or Sis…none of it made any sense.

"Why didn't you answer our calls?" Yin said.

He looks sympathetically at us. "My cell phone was broken at a council meeting. It got pretty wild in there; they ran me out of Condolet. One of my old friends threw a sword at me, he was so furious. Once I said that I didn't want to lead the country, they wanted nothing more to do with me."

"Was it because of us?" Yin asked, still trembling.

He looked uncomfortable. "They mentioned you quite a few times."

_Or more than that,_ I thought as I looked into his face. I saw that his arm was bandaged and I asked, "What happened to you?"

He lifted up his arm. "The sword that was thrown cut me across the arm. I went to the doctor's and got it patched up. While I was there he told me a few…other things too."

Rain the leopard put her ears back and grabbed her clothes with her teeth, going upstairs. I thought she went simply to get redressed, but she didn't come back. I couldn't figure out why she wasn't coming back down. I rethought about it and a slow understanding came to me. As a family, she wanted to give us some privacy.

"What did he say?" I asked, my throat clenched. Something was wrong, not right. I could sense it in the air like some horrid bird, ready to fall and kill. Dad looked scared and worried, but not for him. Yin shook his arm and asked, "Daddy, what happened?"

He grabbed both of our hands. My body tensed. He only did that once before, when I was sick in the hospital. It was only when something really, really horrible was about to emerge and attack us with long, stinging talons…

"Rain can sense it," He started. "And I want both of you to know that I'm not afraid. I've had a very long and full life,"

"What's going on?" I asked. My voice had risen to a high pitch; Yin's eyes looked wide, and petrified.

"I'm very old," he stated. "And very sick. I didn't know until a few days ago,"

"What do you have?" I asked, struggling to breathe.

"A virus. They're going to try treatment, but we're not sure how much it's going to help. I could live for a long time yet, don't worry."

I was worrying. I was worrying a lot. Yin began crying, and at the sight of her tears I began freaking out. My nails raked over my skin again and again, drawing blood. Nobody noticed until Yin gasped and I still did it, scratching HARD.

"Hey," Dad said, and he grabbed me with one arm. "Come here," He drew us both close, the twins, to his side and we leaned against him, shivering. I wasn't crying; I was simply concentrating on the stinging that was covering my arms, the liquid that was slowly dripping down them…

Rain came back down. There was an odd look in her eyes; I drew away from Dad and got up, walking over to her. "Rain, what's going on?"

Her eyes were still glossy. "The masked woman," she whispered. "The masked woman is here."

"What are you talking about?" Dad said, but before he could answer half the house was blown away. Rain and I were slammed to the floor while Dad shielded Yin; I looked up with terror to find the creature that had been haunting all our thoughts.

The shaded woman. She was here. She had made a bridge across the pass with magic, and was now lifting her delicate hand menacingly, her face still hidden. Dad bolted in front of us, almost face to face with the person.

"Go, children!" Dad said. "I'll hold her off, flee!"

"We can't leave you here!" I shouted, but Dad pushed me away and said, "You will obey me, Yang, go!"

I hated to leave him alone, but I had to do what he said. I pulled Rain off the ground and grabbed Yin, pushing through the door that was still standing and unto the enchanted bridge. It didn't take long for us to get across it. Rain and I sunk into a quick run, but not before we heard Yin scream.

I turned to see her watch our Dad getting his butt kicked. The woman was slamming him against the ground and the rocks, over and over, choking him with magic. He was struggling, and Yin grabbed my jacket, shaking and pleading with me.

"Sis, we've got to go!" I yell, trying to tear her hands away.

"He's sick, bro, we can't just let him fend for himself! He's our dad, he's the only family we've got left besides each other!" She screamed, tears in her eyes.

Rain was tugging at my arm. She wanted to run, to get away. But I took one look into Yin's eyes and heard a voice in my head say, _Warriors don't run from a fight._

I brought out my sword. "You're right. We've got to help," I charged back across the bridge and saw Rain out of the corner of my eye make for the trees…at least she would be safe, I knew, and this was a family matter anyway. As I raised my sword ten feet away from the woman Dad blasted out a jet of magic and both her hood and her dark mask came flying off; Yin and I both paused in shock.

Our mother. Trinity. The figure that had been chasing and harassing us constantly was the beauty that had loved our dad, had saved my life. My sword dropped to the ground and Dad stared at the woman, open mouthed. Yin lost it; she ran at Trinity with her arms outstretched and cried, "Mother!"

"Yin, don't!" I cried, but it was too late. Vines sprung up from the ground and tied Dad down to the soil; Trinity set a jet of magic at me that bound my arms and legs. Unable to move, we watched in terror as Yin raced towards our mother with a crazed, insane expression.

"Mom!" she yelled. She jumped forward to embrace her but the woman pushed her against the ground. Hurt, Yin looked up and fended off an attack when the woman tried to blast her away.

"Mother! Mom, don't you remember me, it's Yin! Your daughter!" she pleaded. Trinity seemed not to hear her. The woman picked her up by her collar…

And hurled her over the side of the cliff. There was only the sound of Yin's scream in the air, the sound of something hitting the bottom…and then, there was silence.


	8. Not Really Living Anymore

"NO!" an unearthly roar ripped from my veins as I charged towards my mother. She sidestepped it easily; I paid her no attention and hurried to look over the side, falling to my knees. My sister was nowhere in sight.

"What'd you do to her!" I bellowed. She said nothing and my father stared at her, his eyes wide and his mouth dropped open in shock. I started to slide down the rocks but she caught my arm; I threw it off nastily and she gave me one long, cruel glance before she turned and ran, getting away. If it had been any other time but now, I wouldn't have let her go. But she just threw my sister off the cliff. I had to make sure Yin was all right, above almost all else.

The climb down was treacherous. I nearly lost my footing on several occasions, and the rocks almost catapulted down on me. Stunned out of his reverie and loose of his bonds my father peeked his head out over the cliff and yelled, "Don't go that way! We'll get to Yin another way!"

"I've got to save her!" I responded in a crazed voice. My eyes scanned the rocks everywhere as I climbed down fifty feet, a hundred feet…where was she? There was no indication of where she was, where she had hit. Dad was hurrying down a hill, but I got to the bottom of the canyon before he did. The rushing spray of the river below hit my face and caused me to freeze, but all I felt was worry and panic. Where was she?

My eyes hit a trail of red, in the water and on the rocks. I had seen that shade of scarlet too often on my own arms to understand that it was blood. Yin and I's shared blood. She was a part of me, and the long stream of red that she had left behind might have well been my own. I saw her clothes tattered on branches, and at the sight I let out a loud cry. She still was nowhere to be seen.

"Yang, wait up!" Dad called. I ignored him. I continued on downstream, following the river and praying that I wouldn't be too late…

The large boulders overshadowed a dark figure lying on the ground. I couldn't see the face or the body, but by the shape and the smallness of it I knew it had to be Yin. I yelled out her name and looked harder; the only way to get to her was to risk my own neck by jumping into the raging river below.

About to jump, I held my breath. But before I could Dad grabbed my arm and said, "You're not going in there! There must be another way!"

"You know there isn't! Let me go," I said, but before I had the strength to rip away the canyon wall started crumbling; it fell, right on top of the figure, smothering all life and letting nothing escape it's grasp.

Somebody was screaming. It was a tortured, barren screaming, the kind that happens when you've lost all hope. It took awhile for me to realize that somebody was me. Dad was shocked; it was all he could do to hold onto me while he started to cry.

"You…you monster!" I cried out. I wrenched myself out of Dad's arms and flew at him, pounding him manically with my fists. "You wouldn't let me save her! You killed her! Our own parents killed her!" I yelled.

"You wouldn't have gotten to her in time," Dad let out in a choked voice, letting me hit him.

"I'll dig her out," I said, trying to jump in the river again, but Dad still restrained me, held onto me as I struggled and fought.

"Yang," a soft voice said behind me. "Let her go,"

"No," I sobbed, but Rain took me away from my father and held me in her arms. I pressed my face into her hair and I whispered, "She's gone. She was so young, and full of life…she was my other half."

"I know, my friend. I know," Rain hushed, and she rubbed small circles in my back. The water from the river was starting to make me cold, soaked as I was, but I didn't care. I wish that I had gotten hypothermia again, so I could crawl into a hole somewhere and die. I didn't want to live. What was the point in it anymore?

Nobody was worse off than me, but Dad seemed to be not too far away. He stared distantly into the water, then to the rocks where Yin was buried, sometimes crying and sometimes looking dead.

It had been a full twenty four hours before any of us moved from the spot. Dad finally arose and said, "We have to leave now. All of us," he said, giving me a second glance.

"No," I protested, tears coming yet again. "I won't leave her. You can't make me,"

"Oh yes I can," he growled. He started dragging me away, with Rain's help, up the canyon path and away from the burial. I screamed and kicked the whole way, but exhausted as I was, it didn't do any good. They pulled me away from Yin's body and once I had gotten to the forest again, they let me go and I laid there in the dirt.

"Yang, we have to move on. Trinity may be back," Rain said gently.

"Let her come," I moaned. "Let her kill me too."

"I won't have this," Dad snapped, and he tried pulling me again. "Get up!"

I crawled into a ball. "Make me."

"Prince Nightstaryang, you are going to move from this spot!" Dad yelled.

"Just keep kicking me while I'm down," I mumbled, and I closed my eyes.

"I will keep kicking you until you move! Get up!" Dad shouted.

My eyes churned open again. There was no point. I shifted onto my hands and knees, then stood shakily. He looked at me up and down with approval before laying his hand on my shoulder. I did not pull away, even though I hated that he was trying to comfort me.

"Let's head home," he suggested, a croak in his throat. "We…we will grieve for her later. Arrange the funeral," he said, and it felt like he punched me in the chest. I wish he had.

I saw Rain's face, how concerned she was for me. I suddenly realized I was angry at her, too. She had run away, turned tail when I needed her most. I set my face into a mask of stone and it remained that way. I was no longer going to show any emotion. Let myself hide behind this gargoyle of boredom and uncaring. I would be like this until I lost myself, let myself fall into the realm of insanity or irrationality. For now and forever, I would no longer show pain. For now, let me bleed.

*

AUGUST.

*

SEPTEMBER

*

OCTOBER

*

"Yang, you're not right,"

Rain sat across from me on the couch, looking as if she were about to cry.

I shrugged. "What makes you say that?"

She fiddled with her fingers, frightened. "You haven't talked much at all for months. You never laugh anymore, you're always hiding in your room, and, well," she bit her lip, anxious. "You act as if you're a robot. You never show anyone any type of emotion."

"So?" I ask, my voice drastically monotone.

"So it has to stop!" she said, her fist banging on the coffee table.

"You'd rather I was crying everywhere all the time?" I say, still not looking at her.

"Even that would be better than this!" she snaps. "Even your Dad is worried!"

I almost roll my eyes, but catch myself just in time. Dad hadn't been the same since Yin…left either. He was either furious or distant, yelling or snapping at the littlest things. I learned to not care long ago; it was harder for Rain.

"Whatever," I said. My Dad joined us in the room. By the sight of his face when he looked at me, a huge hole was pounded into my stomach once again. I know he hates me. I can see it every time he notices I'm alive.

It was hot in here. I pulled off my jacket, uncaring if anybody saw. At the sight of my arms, both parties gasped.

"Young man," Dad started, and I paid him no heed, "Where did you get all those scratches?"

"These?" I ask, looking at my arm. There were long, jagged lines running up and down both limbs; some were almost a half an inch deep and the length of a ruler. There weren't only a few, either; there was no spot on my skin that was left unmarked.

"Yes, those," he responded in a tone that made it seem like he was sick.

"Where do you think?" I ask, and he flinches. I lean back on my chair and say, "I couldn't believe neither of you noticed before."

"I noticed!" Rain stood up. "Yang, you've got to stop hurting yourself like this. It needs to stop!" Rain protested.

"Why should I?" I said in a voice like stone. "It means nothing, I only just saw the person I love the most be killed by her own mother,"

"You don't know that for sure," Dad said, his face pale.

I snorted. "We don't know that. We just saw it with our own eyes."

"That could have been someone disguised as her! You never know," Rain said, even though I know she didn't believe it.

I turned my head to look at them for the first time. Dad's expression was full of hurt, a world full of pain, and I despised the fact that I looked so much like him, that I had to share his eyes…

"I've had enough," he snaps. "This has gone too far. I'm tired of your cold attitude, and no matter how much I try to love you or make it better, it's not good enough! I'm…I'm sending you away!"

There was a silence in the room as he said this. "Think of this just now, did you?" I say.

"No, I did not," he said. "I've been looking into programs lately. For kids like you,"

"Disturbed cutters, you mean," I say. He doesn't blink an eye.

"Yes," he says. "Unless you want to change your ways. Show some feeling,"

I don't move an inch. He begins to walk out of the room and says, "Pack your bags. You won't have much time left here."

Rain's broken down; she can't stand the thought of being alone. I almost feel sorry for her, but I quickly store that away for tonight's slashing session. I go up to my room to do as he said, my insides shaking, my outside calm. Yeah, I was selfish. Yeah, I was hurting everyone else around me, making it harder for everyone, but in all reality I honestly didn't care. There was little I cared about anymore.

_Sorry for the long wait! Please review and take part in my poll (on my profile page) ;) _


	9. The Golden Locket

The train station is bustling, and ridiculously busy. We're an odd group compared to everyone else; quiet, reserved, and avoiding eye contact. If you throw me in, there's hardly any speaking to each other.

"Now remember," Dad says, and he makes sure he has my attention before speaking. "Be nice to your grandmother. It's only for a few weeks, after all. By that time you may be a little better, and you can come home. Got it?"

I don't say anything. I'm still hurt, though in all reality it's my own fault. Rain hasn't stopped crying for days; she brings out something shiny from her pocket and my eyes land on her, interested.

"Here," she whispers. "It's a locket that I bought for you. It has my picture inside." She opens it up and shows me, and there I do see a tiny face. "I think you'll want to wear it if you…get lonely."

I don't reply, but I hope my eyes say it all. I take it slowly from her and begin to put it in my suitcase, but when I see her tearful expression I sigh and put it around my neck. Even though I'm grieving and still holding a grudge, I can't seem to say no to her.

"And there you are," an elderly voice says behind me. I turn around to see my Grandma Honey, a strict expression on her face, though it is sympathetic. Even though I have only known her for a short time, I know that Yin, "the second Trinity" was her favorite.

"Ready to go?" she asks, after about an hour of catching up (aka making sure Dad's alright). She gestures her head to grab my suitcase and I do so.

"You'll be alright, kid," Dad says, nodding at me. "You're gonna be just fine."

"If you say so," I shrug nonchalantly. I let him hug me, and Rain too. As I'm pressing my face into her hair she says gently, "Watch out for yourself. You're near the Pakavalien border. It's a war zone there right now,"

"When has it never been?" I try to make her laugh, totally going against my promise to myself to keep the silent treatment going. She doesn't even smile.

"Let's head out," Honey finishes. We board the train and I can't resist giving Dad and Rain at least a little smile, and a comforting wave. Might as well pretend that everything's all right, even though it's not. Pretend that I'm going to spend a few calming weeks catching up with Gran, instead of going to spend fourteen days in a mental hospital with therapy.

Honey doesn't talk much, and I'm glad for that. I'm content to simply watch the scenery roll by, and try to stay immersed in this little hole of my mind…try to make myself feel that Yin was still here and not dead, and that her body was probably still pinned under all those rocks. Even though we hired a search team, we never found her…

_She's in a better place now, _I say to myself. _A much better place, where she can be happy and she doesn't have to worry about her masochistic brother. _I don't have to want to think about how I've been drawing her name on my wrist with black markers so I don't forget her. Even though it has been months, half of me is still missing.

"It's our first stop," Honey says after hours of traveling. To me, its only felt like a few minutes. "Best to get out now and stretch your legs."

I nod and go out into the small town that we've landed in, walking back and forth and following my grandmother as she tries to get some food into me, tries to interest me in _something _so she can report that taking me over wasn't a total loss. It was vastly unresponsive. It's not that I don't want to…I want to start living again…but its hard…

"I'm going back to the train," I say. "I'm feeling kind of tired."

"I understand. Traveling makes you feel that way," she nods. "I'll be back in a few minutes, after I use the ladies room."

"Alright," I say. I take the ten minute walk back and board the long, stretched out train; there's nobody on here, not even the conductor.

I'm making my way back to my seat. As I go I realize that there _is_ somebody on the train with me; he has seemed to appear out of nowhere. I tap on his shoulder and says, "Excuse me. Do you mind if I get through?"

The man turns around, and at the sight of his face I am paralyzed by several things; fear, shock, disbelief.

Eradicus. I think I'm finally going crazy. I'm seeing my foe, the one I ran through, standing in my path with a giant grin on his face. He cocks his head at me, and starts to laugh. "Surprised?"

"No," I whisper. "This can't be happening."

"But it is," he chuckles. He moves closer, and I back off slowly, watching my back. Where was my sword when I needed it? In my suitcase, on the other side of him…

"I'm going insane," I said. "I cut too deep one too many times. I'm seeing things,"

"I assure you, I am very much in front of you," he still smiles.

"But…but you're dead!" I shouted out loud. "I killed you!"

"Your mother healed me," he said haughtily. "After your family ran. Isn't that pleasant?"

The words hit me like a dead weight. My mother healed him. I had hoped, perhaps, as a deep, dark hope, that maybe somehow her throwing Yin off the cliff was a mistake…yet I could see that wasn't it now. I could see the side she chose.

"Why?" I choked out.

"Why? Because she loves me, of course," he shakes his head. "She wants to start a new life with me. However, there's one slight flaw…you."

His eyes are dead set on me. "Me? What does she want with me? Does she want to kill me too?"

"No," he says, and now his tone becomes perplexed. "I'm not sure what she wants with you. She wants me to bring you back, whole, to her. She couldn't care less about your father or the other girl. All she wants is you."

"So you're going to bring me back to her?" I ask.

He grits his teeth, and I can see for the first time he looks annoyed. "No. No, I don't want Trinity focusing her attention on anyone but me. I would kill you now, but if she ever found out then I would lose her trust for good, and that is something that I don't want to do. If I, however, say that I couldn't find you, then that's a different story."

"Then what can I do?" I ask, scared. I'll do anything in order to keep Trinity away from my Dad and Rain.

He leans forward. "I'm giving you a warning. Stay out of her sight. Stay out of _my _sight. If you can get far enough away from here, then Trinity will soon forget all about you, and your family as well. She only killed your sister in order to get to you…"

If he had stabbed me with a knife it wouldn't have hurt worse than that statement. I nod, fighting tears and say, "Fine, I'll leave. But you must give me your word that you won't harm my father, or my grandmother, or my friends. If you do, I'll come back and remind her of me all over again. You can be sure of that. After all…" I look at my arms and for once _he_ looks intimidated. "It's not like I care about my life anymore."

Looking sour that he's making a deal with a ten year old, he nods grimly and says, "Agreed." We shake hands and I pull away quickly, disgusted that I'm touching someone who has destroyed so many lives. He pushed past me and had evaporated into the crowd in an instant. I paid no attention to what direction he went.

Stunned, I sat down in my seat, wondering what to do now. Should I go to the treatment center? Go back home? I'm contemplating this for a minute before it hits me; I _couldn't _go back home. If I did, I would be leading Trinity right to the place where Dad and Rain were. I couldn't go to the treatment center either. She would track me, and kill my grandmother too. Anywhere within a five hundred mile radius of Pakavel was a bad idea. There was only one option.

I was going to have to run away. Again. But this time, it wasn't a sneak-out-for-one-night-and-be-found-the-next-morning. No, it was a, leave-and-hide-and-never-come-back-before-somebody-gets-hurt. I was fourteen years old, and running for my life. I would have to take care of myself.

Oh darn, this was going to kill them. Rain and Dad. Dad especially. He just lost his daughter, and now he finds out that his emotionally disturbed only son is hitting the streets…? And Rain…poor, beautiful Rain…she was dependent on me, and depending on my return. How was she going to react when she found out that I was never coming back? If I had known that our goodbye was going to be the last time I would ever see them, I would have made it a lot better.

I don't even want to know what my grandmother was going to think. Probably that I had lied to her. That had never been my intention, but she was going to get a lot of crap from my Dad for letting me wander out of her sight. I was fourteen, though. None of this was her fault.

I was going to have to travel light. I couldn't lug this large suitcase around with me. I took account of my possessions. My sword, of course. I would be needing that. A few of my best and most wearable clothes. I could sell my cell phone and trade it for another one at the store, so my family couldn't call me and my enemies couldn't trace me. The money Dad gave me I would need for food, and I would eventually have to get a job so I would always have more…

I opened up my suitcase and took out a picture of Yin and me, and shoved it in my pocket. I then took the same picture, only in a smaller format, and put it inside the locket Rain had given me. Now both sides of the locket were taken. It would stay around my neck constantly, and I would only take it off for when I was sleeping. Even then I would keep it safely in my hands.

I take my belongings and shove them in a plastic bag I found in the train. People are starting to board; I have to make my exit quickly. I can't take another train; I'll be too easily traced by my grandmother. I hop off the back of the train and in the opposite direction of the station, having no idea where I'm heading. I go to the street and grab a taxi, pulling out a couple bills from my wallet. I look in a puddle; I could pass for sixteen, if I dirty up my face and look tough enough.

"Where to?" the driver asks, looking at me suspiciously.

I brush my bangs into my eyes and lean against the seat, trying to look older. It's a good thing my voice has changed so much. "As far south as that money will take me. I don't care where it stops." As we begin moving I take hold of the locket in my right hand, and grasp my bag with the other. This was all I had now. This, God, and my memories.

Not including myself.

Only myself.

My one traveling companion.

Oh gosh, I hope I found somebody friendly to stick with soon. A halfway house or something. If I didn't and had only my own mind to contemplate with, there was no doubt that I really would lose it.


	10. I Wanna Fly, Yin

Here I stand…empty hands…wishing my wrists were bleeding…to stop the pain from the beatings and…

My music player dies, cutting off the sounds of Flyleaf's Red Sam. "Shit," I mutter, rolling the headphones around it and stashing it back into my pocket. The player was one of the few possessive things I had taken with me, along with a charger that plugged into the wall. With the music blaring, it puts the silence and my thoughts at bay for a little while longer.

"You alright back there kid?" the cab driver asks, glancing back.

I nod. "I'm fine. When do we stop?"

"The cash you gave me will take you another five miles. After that, you're on your own," he says.

"Thanks," I say. Within a few minutes we're in a small town in the middle of nowhere. It'll be nearly impossible for my family to trace me to here. I get my bag and he drives off, leaving me once again, alone.

The first thing I have to do is to find shelter. I look around to see a hotel nearby and start walking towards it, ignoring that the place is practically vacant of all life. On a playground that I pass a little boy and girl are playing on the merry go round; the girl screams for her brother to push her faster.

Blinking away tears, I enter the boring hotel and put my bangs down over my eyes to try and make myself look older. I wish I was taller…it's a good thing I've got more muscle mass than the usual fourteen year old from training, even though I'm still kind of scrawny. I mosey up to the desk as casually as I can and try to make my voice go a little deeper.

"Name?" the receptionist asks, a dull look flashing across his face.

"Collin Banks," I say, flashing out the fake name.

"How many?"

"One. I need a single bedroom."

"Age?"

"Sixteen," I say casually, letting the lie roll off my tongue.

"Can't rent a room if you're under eighteen. Sorry." He says.

I pull one of my last twenties out of my pocket. "Sure about that?" I ask, tossing him the bill.

The guy looks at me like he can't believe what's happening. He then glances from side to side and says, "Whatever, I'll let you through. But if anyone asks, you're with a parent, you got it?"

"Sure thing," I say. I travel up to my room and spread my few possessions out, locking the door and counting the money last. I've got enough cash to make it at least five days in this hotel if I don't eat, and four if I do sparingly. My stomach growls; a growing kid like me, a ravenous teenage boy, needs nutrition. I couldn't get enough food at home when I had it at my endless supply, let alone on a budget.

My eyes droop and I fall to the bed. I'm so tired, but worse than that, I'm lonely. I'm feeling so alone, it feels like I'm losing my mind. I start to slowly fade into oblivion and I drift happily into the world of sleep. Let the world go, if at least for a little while.

*

Three days later I'm planning out how to get more money so I can run out of here. People are starting to get suspicious in this small villa, and my fake name has come up in more than a few conversations, I'm sure. Not everybody can be fooled into thinking I'm old enough to stay alone. I should have gone for the city…though more dangerous and expensive, it would have been easier to go unnoticed.

I snap my skin gently with a rubber band and try to keep calm. As another trick of my self created rehab, I left every sharp object behind. Finding pointy things here has proven to be a challenge. I haven't cut, simply because I can't.

Trying to relax, I flip on the TV and drop onto the bed. My eyes widen in horror as I see the face on the screen, the small picture that the newscaster is reporting about.

"This fourteen year old boy goes by the name of Yang and has light brown hair with violet eyes. His escape is possibly a reaction to the death of his twin sister several months earlier…"

Death of his twin sister…

"If anyone should see him, please call the number below the screen immediately. He is considered to be emotionally troubled and perhaps suicidal. His father is offering an immense reward for his return, as shown in the next story. Kenny?"

The newscaster switches off screen to her cohort, who is interviewing an investigator about me. By the looks of it, he's right on my trail.

It's dad. I know it is. He's already lost one child; he's not going to lose another.

I have to get out of here. Probably every house in the neighborhood has seen my face. That broadcast has reached everyone in the Tri-State region. I was going to have to find the nearest airport and hop a plane somehow. There went the rest of my cash.

I grab my bag immediately and start stuffing it with my crap. It doesn't take long. I start to head down the hotel stairs but I pause in my tracks, seeing that two officers are at the counter talking to the employees.

Not good. The police are showing them my picture. The receptionist nods to them and my stomach clenches; I'm officially known as a runaway. If I go downstairs they'll catch me for sure, and force me to go back home. I. Cannot. Go. Back. Home.

I'm walking. There's no way around it. I go back up the stairs and head the opposite direction, to the back entrance that leads to the pool. After getting out there I jump over the fence, and being walking as fast as I can without looking suspicious. I hit the road and keep going, mile after mile after mile…

My head feels clogged, fuzzy and so very heavy. The road thins out into one straight line as the desert that I'm traveling though lengthens. It never seems to end, not ever. No cars pass me by. I'm alone…horribly, horrible alone.

After a few hours, I have to stop. I'm so exhausted, and so sick. I lean over and start throwing up, until there's nothing left in my system to heave. Like there was much in there anyway…

I'm dehydrated immensely. If I don't drink some water fast this is going to turn out very badly very quickly. When is the next town coming up? The next city, the next anything, something has got to be around here somewhere.

By some miracle, a car is drifting slowly down the road from the way I came. It slows down to a crawl and the window rolls down slowly. It is a woman, and a very pretty woman at that. She has a scarf around her head, and she is wearing large sunglasses that cover almost half her face.

"You lost?" she asks, looking around.

I shrug. "Not really." How can you be lost when you've got nowhere to go?

"You sure look like it," She leans her arm out the window. "My name's Marge. You running away?"

"Maybe. Why do you want to know?" I ask, but not rudely.

"I own a halfway house for teens," she says, and she nods her head. "If you get in my car I can make sure you've got food and shelter for at least a few nights."

I look her over again. "You sure you're not going to murder me or sell me as a slave or something?"

She sighs, and pulls out a card out of her pocket. I look it over and see that address of some sort of shelter. I look out at the dust. It's either go with her and take my chances that she'll brutally kill me or die out here alone.

"Whatever," I sigh, and hop in the back seat. I buckle in and she asks, "So where were you headed?"

I sink against the fabric. "Nowhere."

"You are lost, then, kid," she tilts her sunglasses down and I see the color of her eyes, a light blue. "Lost inside."

Like I haven't been that for awhile, I think. I pull out my MP3 and we travel for I don't know how long. She doesn't ask me any questions and I don't ask her any.

She wants to go home, but nobody's home…it's where she lies…broken inside…

After about three hours of driving (my mind is confirmed; I certainly would have died if I had walked) we come into a large city. I stare fearlessly out the window as we pass gangsters on the streets, and homeless people crying out for a ride. I wonder what happened to them that put them in such poverty.

_There's no place to go, no place to go…to dry her eyes…broken inside…_

How fitting was this song for this situation. I wonder how Avril Lavinge got the inspiration for this. We somewhat emerge from the slums and Marge pulls into a smushed looking building. The sign reads, "Sunshine Shelter."

This is anything but sunshine. The entire thing is painted gray. I open the door and don't let my eyes fall from the place, looking right to the dilapidated door that's nearly hanging off the hinges. I leave my earbuds in.

_Her feelings she hides, her dreams she can't find, she's losing her mind, she's falling behind…She can't find her place, she's losing her faith, she's fallen from grace she's all over the place…yeah…_

"Rules here are this," Marge says. "No drugs, no alcohol. You addicted to anything, you had better get over it fast because the second we catch you doing something you're out of here and into rehab."

"Don't worry," I say. "I'm not addicted to any of that."

She notices my tone, but doesn't say anything. "Food is served at eight, twelve and five. You don't show, you don't eat unless something is left over, and with all the kids here there usually isn't anything left over. Don't be loud past nine at night and nine in the morning. Be nice to the others here and you'll fit in just fine. Most of them have been here three months or more."

"I won't bother anybody if they don't bother me," I say. We enter and I see the place is crammed with old furniture that was probably fashioned when my dad was born and a musty old smell of weariness. It's pretty dark; only a tiny little light bulb gives off any light.

"There's an empty bed on your right. Be careful when you go in though. Bruce is probably sleeping," she whispers. I nod and go in through the door; the shades are drawn and the unknown Bruce (one heck of a very skinny and very, very tall looking guy) is resting on a couch with a torn blanket on top of him. I set my stuff down on my own new bed and lie down to sleep as well. I could stay here, at least for a little bit longer.

*

"Hey, newbie," one of the girls called Ingrid cries. "If you're not going to eat that, mind if I finish?"

I stare at my untouched chicken. "Sure, go ahead." I push the plate across the table and Ingrid devours it up within a few seconds. Even though I've been here for almost a week and a half, every kid here insists on calling me newbie. My eyes travel around the table, trickling round and round at all the familiar faces.

Ingrid's pregnant. You can tell by the way her stomach keeps growing and by the way she eats. She didn't know how her parents would react, so she ran away. Marge found her on a park bench in the inner city. My roommate Bruce was on the drugs, but he just got out of rehab and he's only here to get back on his feet. One kid named Rodney got kicked out by his rents. I don't know what for; he won't tell me. Each and every one of us is here because we're broken; you can tell by the bags under our eyes that we've seen too much. I thought that I had it bad, until I came here. I think they have it figured out that I'm a cutter. These guys are good at deciphering what's wrong with you.

"Newbie," Rodney raises an eyebrow, and I look at him immediately, almost like a servant. He's holding up the one phone that we have and says, "Somebody is on the phone for you. Says he's your dad,"

My stomach clenches. The kids are looking at me with a mixture of hatred and hope. Half of them are expecting that I slam down the phone and never call back. The other half are demanding that I go answer. They never get a call from their rents, and they would kill to get one. Some of their parents even know that they are here, but don't care.

What do I do? My blood pulsates slowly and I get up from the chair in a daze, taking my time. I take the phone in my hand and stare at it; Ingrid nods at me encouragingly.

"Who's there?" my voice asks, suspicious.

There's an instant sigh of relief, then a shaking voice hushes, "Thank God, you're alright. I found you."

I don't reply. There's nothing that I can say to my father right now that is going to make either one of us feel better. Eradicus could have this line tapped…but then again, I'm so far away from home, that I doubt that he's bothering to track me anymore. Probably has forgotten all about me, I hope.

"Son," he starts, and I can hear the way his voice sounds. He's crying. "Please come home. I wondered if sending you away was the right idea. We can fix this right here, at home. There are specialists in the area who are experts in dealing with self injury. We can fix this. I'll take you to grief counseling, too. They can help take some of the pain of Yin's death away. Just don't cut yourself anymore. I'm begging you. Look what its led to."

That's right. Make them think that exactly. That I was running away out of my own fear, my cutting habit, instead to keep them alive. Funny how that turned out in their favor…

"Yang, please stop," he said, and I struggled to ignore his voice. "We just want to help. Take it easy."

"You can't help me," I mumbled, and tears spring up in my eyes. "Nobody can."

"You should see Rain," he says, and his voice becomes shadowed, difficult for me to read. "She's lost without you…she wanders around, confused, and she doesn't speak. She doesn't know who she is. It's like taking care of a two year old!" his voice rises, knowing he's found my weak spot. "For goodness sakes, please come home!"

I don't answer again. An image of Rain, standing in her old cell, is swirling around in my head. He sighs and says, "If you want I can come get you. My own treatment up at the hospital here is going very well. If that's what's bothering you, I can assure you that I'm getting better. Just please…please…"

I do nothing but breathe into the phone. It breaks my heart, but I've got to do this. After a minute long pause he says, "When you come to your senses…our door will always be open."

The phone clicks and all I hear is static. That's all there is. I slowly hang up myself, missing the first time and finally setting it down on the wall. Everybody looks at me with curiosity, and fear. I go to the door with a dead expression and Rodney moves out of my way, almost as if he's afraid too. I go out the door and break into a run, making way for the city park. Maybe that'll be someplace where I won't have to face my pain. I grab the locket around my neck as I go and sprint down the sidewalk, looking for a distraction…any distraction.

It comes in the form of a large stone bridge. Nobody is on it this late at night. I walk up to it slowly and look at my reflection in the water below. It's a long way down; I remember the time when I was questioning Dad how long it would take for me to die if I jumped off a cliff. That was nearly a year ago, now.

My face stares deeply below, into the pitch blackness. It would be very easy, just like walking into the arms of death. An idea formed in my head; a twisted, dark idea, in which I would fall very quickly and feel nothing as I hit. I've thought about it before, of course…but I've never come this close. But that's over. This ends tonight.

"I could fly right off here, you know," I whisper. "Fly just like Yin…" It takes me only a few seconds to make up my mind. I climb up on the sides of the stone, grasping onto my locket and rising onto my tiptoes. The wind ruffles my hair and makes me shiver under the maddening cold of the night. There's nothing left for me to do but jump now. Just one last thing. I clench tighter to the locket, and open it slowly.

I see my sister's face inside. I know she wouldn't want me to do this. After all, she had unknowingly given herself up to keep me alive. But there was no other way. They were going to keep tracking me and then bring me home, and once they did, Eradicus would find them and kill us all. Better that one of us die simply than to have everyone be massacred.

"You've already sacrificed yourself for someone," I hushed to her. "Now it's my turn. Watch me fly, Yin. Watch me fly."

I close the locket back up. I couldn't look at Rain's picture. It would hurt too much to see her astounding beauty, and to be reminded of my great love for her. "I'm doing this for you," I say, and tears start streaming down my cheeks. "It's because I love you, Rain. That's why I'm going to jump."

I stick one foot out and close my eyes, starting to fall forward. A voice behind me yells, "Wait!" and I pause in mid jump, looking over my shoulder.

A man is standing there, a tall, muscular man with light brown hair. The lights of his car are illuminating the area where I'm planning to go under. Now that I can see, the drop looks even more frightening.

"Stay back," I warn him. "Or I'm going to jump!"

"You were going to jump anyway," the man says, his arms out. "Let's calm down and take this very slowly. You don't want to do this,"

"Yes I do," I say, and start crying more. He has no idea how much I want to take the plunge.

"No you don't," he repeats. "This is selfish and stupid. If you do, you're just going to make everything worse. Think of all the people you're going to hurt. Now climb down from there slowly, and we can talk things out."

"I'm tired of talking it out," I say, but he has my attention now. With every second that's passing, it makes it harder to want to fall.

"If you jump I'm coming in after you, whether you like it or not." He starts removing his coat and my stomach clenches. I can't risk another life, not at my expense.

"Come on kid," he says, and he takes one step forward. He inches forward cautiously, and I don't move an inch. What's the probability that he'll come in after me? Very high. This guy looks like he means business.

I let him come closer, closer, and then he snatches me off the side of the bridge like it was no trouble at all. Still keeping a grip on me but not letting me go he says, "Now that's better, isn't it? Not as cold down here?"

I shake my head. He guides me to his car and says, "You look pretty beat; I've got some hot chocolate in the backseat that I haven't touched, if you want it."

I nod. He guides me to his car and I clamber inside, pulling a green blanket on top of me as I go inside. There's also a small pillow, and some food. It was as if this guy was expecting me.

"Where are we going?" I ask sleepily as he starts up the car and we begin to drive away from the bridge.

"To my place," he says. "You can stay there for as long as you want. Don't worry about your things; I picked them up at the shelter."

So this guy had been expecting me. My head hits the pillow and I hear the man say, "My name's Terrence, by the way."

*

The next time I wake up it's about three in the morning. I'm lying on a couch in the middle of a bachelor pad, with the only light on being the one in the kitchen. I keep quiet and listen; apparently, Terrence is talking to somebody on the phone.

"Yeah…yeah, I found him, Yomen. What was he doing? Trying to throw himself off a bridge," Terrence said. "Hold on now, don't have a heart attack! I've got him, he's fine now. I'm not sure if he should come home right away though…he might not be able to handle it. Yomen, seriously, you don't know how bad it is. He was muttering, 'Fly with me Yin, fly with me,' when I found him. Yeah, we are lucky I did."

My body goes as rigid as a board. He was talking to my father. My dad now knew that I had tried to commit suicide by falling to my death. Oh, the agony…

"He's staying at my place. No no, don't trouble yourself. He'll come home when he's ready. I'll look after him until then. For crying out loud Yomen, he's my nephew! The least thing I can do for my sister's kid is to try and make sure he doesn't splatter himself against the ground. No, you never did a very good job of keeping Trinity under control, did you? Yeah, well, you and I never got along very well in the first place. The point is that I think he should stay here and you think he should be there. I completely know what I am doing! Give it a few days…fine. Fine then. So I guess it's settled. Talk to you later then. Bye."

Terrence shortly hung up. He comes steaming into the room and he sees that my eyes are wide open, cast against the lamplight.

"You heard that, huh?" he asks, looking at me meekly.

I am unable to say a word. "Uncle Ter?" I ask gently.

He smiles half heartedly. "That's me."

The prospect that my missing uncle has suddenly appeared out of nowhere and saved my life hits me hard. My hand flashes to the comfort of my locket but it's not there; my necklace is missing.

_Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! This is my present to you. For the New Year, I'm starting a new thing where every three reviews, I'll update. I am doing this because I really would like to hear feedback from all of you, and it's really important to me as a writer so I can tell what the readers like. So review review review! Please please please!!! La la laaaaa…ooops, sorry. Okay, whatever. Have fun _


	11. The Eyes in the Mirror

"The locket," I say with clarity, starting to panic. "Where's the locket! I need it! Where did it go?"

"Hey, relax," Terrence says, and he pulls out my locket from his jacket. "I only took it for safekeeping. You can have it back."

I snatch it out of his hands quickly. I put it back over my neck and he says glumly, "Something important in there, I take it,"

"Yes," I say. "A picture of my friend…and my sister."

"Ah," he says slowly. He drifts over to a dresser and says, "I've got some new clothes in here for you. Picked them out special. Better than the rags you wear, anyway,"

"What are we doing?" I ask, noticing he's grabbing his car keys.

"I'm gonna teach you how to be a man," he says, tossing me a shirt. "Now get dressed. Today's going to be a busy one,"

I scowl. The prospect of Uncle Terrence suddenly teleporting back into my life after a very long absence and instantly expecting to teach me how to "be a man" wasn't really my cup of tea. But what choice did I have? I look at what he's tossed to me. "What, no long sleeves?" I ask.

"No way," Terrence says. "You're not getting any new cuts when I'm around, thank you very much,"

"Everybody's going to notice!" I protest, wrapping my arms around my body.

"That's your problem. Don't be a cutter and nobody will notice," he says.

I'm absolutely fuming. I don't move another inch until he says, "Oh, alright then, go on and wear this sweater. See if I care."

About a half an hour later we're in the square eating breakfast. I've hardly touched my food; the insanity that I could have been dead right now has scared me out of my wits, and everything I take down makes me want to throw up.

Terrence is already done with the two plates he's scarfed down and is making me eat what's on my plate, no matter how long it takes me. He scrolls through my music player, looking at the thing with disapproval.

"Never Too Late…Pain…Bring Me To Life…what is this crap?" he asked as he scrolled through the songs.

"It's my music," I said, irritated. "What's wrong with it?"

"It's depressing sap songs!" he stated. "Now this is something you should be listening to!"

He took out his own MP3, puts it on loud with the headphones plugged in, and started bobbing his head. My mouth dropped open in disbelief as I recognized the tune.

"Sexy Back? You've got to be kidding me," I say as sarcastically as possible.

"What? This is my theme song," he grins.

"Whatever," I roll my eyes and pick some more at my food.

"Don't put that emo crap on me. I know how you people work," he says.

"I'm not emo!" I snap bitterly. "Emo is a fashion choice and music preference."

"Oh right, you've just got low self esteem," he says.

"No I do not," I say, even though I know it's a lie.

"Go try and pick up some phone numbers from those girls in the corner, then," he points. I turn to see a bunch of giggling teenagers in short skirts and pink sweaters around my age, dipping their hands into a fountain and splashing each other.

"What? No, that's disrespectful," I say. He is really starting to tick me off.

"Aren't they pretty enough for you?" he asks. I glance at them again and look closer. They're dressed pretty nice, with really bouncy hair and soft smiles. One has a laugh like a wind chime and another one has a smile that could outshine the sun. Yet when I look at them, I feel absolutely zero. They're nothing like Rain.

At that second a phone rings. Terrence picks it up and says, "Yomen! It's wonderful to chat, especially after little conversation last night. I'm just talking to your son here about girls,"

I can hear my dad screaming on the other line. "No, no, of course not, I'm not giving him that little speech! Unless you'd like me to…"

More yelling. Terrence holds the phone away from his ear and says, "Slow down, old man. So, kid, you got a girl you like then, huh?"

My heart pounds against my ribcage. "No,"

"I know you're an experienced liar, but you can't fool me," he says, and his gaze on me is enough to melt me to the core. "You like someone, don't you?"

"I told you I don't," I say, and my face turns bright red.

"Did you hear that, Yomen? Your kid's got a crush!" Terrence starts laughing into the phone line and there's more talking. Terrence wipes away tears and says, "Really? You think you know who it is? Really…" He looks at me and bursts into more laughter.

I sink as low in my seat as possible. We're attracting a lot of attention. An old lady with a baby carriage hurries past us quickly and Terrence mutters, "Doesn't like anyone…he can't fool me."

I don't answer. I'm thinking about how Dad said Rain was lost without me, like a tiny two year old…

"What am I doing? Teaching your son how to be a man, Yomen!" he practically screams into the phone.

There's a garbled yelling and Terrence says, "No, of course I never doubted your masculinity, only your ability to teach it to your boy. My sister saw something in you, didn't she? I'm not quite sure what…"

There's more garbling and he says, "Let him talk to you! Do you think there's any chance in-"

"It's okay," I say, reaching my hand out for the phone. "Let me speak to him. It may stop his worrying,"

Terrence grimaces, but he begrudgingly hands me the phone. With my voice quivering I ask, "Hello?"

"Yang? Is that you?" he says.

I sigh. "Yes Dad, it's me."

"How are you?" he says. "A bit shaken up? Scared? I would be."

"I'm…I'm okay." I state. "It's not that big of a deal…"

"Of course it is! Were you going to jump?" he asks instantly.

It takes me a few seconds to answer, then I decide to answer honestly. "Yes."

All I hear is static. Dad sighs and says, "We'll talk about when you get home…you can be sure of that,"

"Okay," I say again. I'm fine with this because honestly, I don't plan on going back home. Whether I'm ditching my uncle or not remains to be seen.

After he's sure I'm all right the first thing he blurts out is, "What is your uncle teaching you out there?"

I go red again. "He's just being…I don't know, my uncle. Nothing too bad,"

"Terrence," he grumbles. "The more time that goes on the more that we don't get along."

"Ha. It rhymes," I say. It's silent for a moment and Dad says, "Alright. I'll be calling frequently, to check up on you. Stay safe,"

_I'll try to, _my mind whispers but I said, "I'll do my best."

"Don't let your emotions run away with you again, are we clear?" he says. "If they do, don't be by yourself, okay? Stay within your uncle's eyesight…"

"It's not a very high possibility that he's going to let me out of it, really," I say with a backwards glance at Terrence.

"Yang, I want you to listen to me. _You are not to be alone_, _at any time_, is that understood?"

His tone indicates one of authority, a master. And I am the student. I drop my gaze and scuff my shoe against the ground. "Clear as crystal, sir."

"Good. Now let me talk to your uncle."

I hand the phone back. Terrence is being anything but obedient; he throws his feet up on the table and says, "It'll be cool, Yo-cat. Gotta scram, kid's nearly done with his breakfast. Don't worry! He's in good hands,"

Terrence hangs up on my father. He bounds up from the table and says, "Now who wants to listen to 'Oops! I Did It Again?'"

*

"_Big brother!" a voice cries. That voice is high and vibrant, a voice that sparkles with as much life as her eyes. _

_I turn to see Yin, in a very pretty yellow princess dress tackling me into the grass and laughing. I push her off of me and she yells, "Tag, you're it!" I follow her where we play, back and forth, in the land of Pakavel where nobody grows old and nobody dies. It's just me and her, in this forever land we call home._

"_Gotcha!" I say as I tag her. She pushes me into the creek nearby and I scoop up some water, splashing it in her face. She laughs and begins running in the opposite direction. I go to follow her, but somebody has me by the shoulder. They're shaking me and yelling into my ear…_

"Hey, hey kid," a voice says from afar. "You're having a nightmare,"

"No," I protest. The apartment begins to come into view and I try to dispel it away, try and turn it back into the yellow sunshine that was my home…

"Kid, wake up! It's only a dream!" Terrence says. Sleep is lost now and I turn my wicked gaze furiously on my uncle, who looks concerned.

"Why did you have to wake me up?" I said, irritated. "We were having so much fun, and you had to go and ruin it!"

"Who?" he asked, confused.

"Me and my sister!" I snapped. What did I ever see in this man, what caused me as a young child to admire him? He had spoiled it, spoiled everything…

"You were crying and tossing around! I think that entails a nightmare!" he says.

I touch my face. I _was _crying. This sucked! I push him away and sit up. "It was a good dream. And you had to wake me."

"I rarely ever have good dreams, and the one I get is taken away from me. Does anyone understand now why I…I…"

"Why you cut?" Terrence asks. I don't answer and he turns away in a hurry; he's mad now too. He begins pacing the floor and asks, "Whatever made you a cutter anyway? You've had a good life! A spoiled prince and then soon to be young warrior, with a roof over your head and plenty of food to eat always! Of course you've had to work hard, but never like Trinity and I did. You've never had to really struggle, you've never been a slave. I was for years, and fought a very hard war after that, and now am fighting another one. I never took a blade to my own arms and you! You, who've had it better than so many others, convince yourself to bleed every night! What's wrong with you?"

I looked away. I really didn't know what was wrong with me; this was the question that I had been struggling with for years. Of course I knew other cutters…but the ones I knew had it much worse than I did. Why I did what I did, I would be fighting with for years.

"I lost a sister," I murmured.

Terrence's voice cracked. "Yeah well, so did I. And guess what? Better your sister died with a good heart than to still be alive and have a murderous one," Terrence said. "Believe me, I know."

This blow struck low and hard. With nothing else to say I asked, "Do you miss her?"

He paused, and a shallowness crept into his voice. "Yes. I miss her everyday."

There's a silence. He turns to me and says, "Are you ready to go home?"

I shake my head. "No. I can't go home. You don't understand…"

"I think it's you that doesn't understand," Terrence says. He grabs me by the arm and drags me into a room; there's only one object in this room, a talk, slim thing being covered up by a dark sheet. Terrence pulls it off and waves his hand. I look at it, not getting the picture.

"It's a mirror," I say. And indeed it is; a mirror that reaches from floor to ceiling, with no frame around it and nothing behind it. I look at him and the look on my face is the exact same one I give my Algebra tests.

He leans over the looking glass and points to it. "Look inside."

I peer closer, seeing only my reflection. Then the platform begins to change, molding until I see my home…the home that I miss so much, that I haven't seen in so long. I go closer until the tip of my nose is touching it and see that the mirror is zooming in; it's my father, and he's greeting someone at the door.

"It's a very late hour, Hank," Dad says. "This had better be important." The guy Hank looks just as confused as I am; it can't be past six thirty.

"Just coming to see how you're doing," Hank says. "Still taking that medication?"

"I am, and it does me more harm than good," he says. As I look closer my stomach drops in shock; Dad's clothes are hanging off of him, there are deep circles under his eyes, and permanent lines seemed to be almost carved into his face. "So if you don't mind I'm going to…Rain! Rain, don't touch that!"

As the mirror turns to Rain I gasp. I had forgotten how pretty she actually was. Her eyes are wide, vacant; the look on her face is one of a blank canvas. She's holding her hand up to a candle, and trying to touch her finger to the flame.

"Is she ill in the head?" Hank asks, and I feel a flash of anger towards him.

"No no, just confused. Rain! Rain!" Dad snaps. It takes a few tries but he finally gets her attention; she turns to him with a curious face.

"That'll hurt you, now don't do it again," Dad says. He sighs. "That's the fourth time this week she nearly set herself on fire by accident…come over here Rain," Dad says. I notice how slowly he speaks to her, as if to a very young infant. "She doesn't remember anything. I have to watch her constantly. Are you finished?"

"Does she follow you everywhere?" Hank asks in perplexity as Rain copies Dad's every movement.

"Sometimes, and I wish she did it always. It's annoying, but its better than her flooding the bathroom by leaving the water running, or throwing all the food out of the pantry or…or…or I don't know what else." Dad leans against the doorframe in exhaustion.

"Shouldn't you send her to a doctor?" Hank asks.

"I can barely afford my own medical bills!" Dad says.

Hank clears his throat. "That boy of yours…how is he coping?"

At the mention of me Rain pauses in her movements; her eyes widen and every inch of her body freezes.

"Not very well," Dad says. "I wish to bring him back here as soon as I can."

"Ah, you miss him?" Hank asks.

"Honestly? Very much. Again, I ask you, are you finished?"

Dad obviously has no time for chatting. Hank shakes his head and says, "No…I'll leave now. You get some rest, sir. I'll be here if you need me."

With this phrase the vision ends. As my reflection returns I ask, "What is that?

"It's a observation mirror," he says. "One of the few things I managed to salvage from the castle. And be glad that I did, because if Trinity had laid her hands on it…"

He stops speaking immediately as the mirror fogs up and displays another location. At the instant it appears I know it is Eradicus' castle. It's a high, beautiful bedroom with lots of light and many tapestries on the walls. There's a boy of about fifteen standing there, with red hair and a lot of tools sticking out of a dirty, oily pair of overalls. A servant.

"You wish to see me, madam?" he asks.

A sweetly thin voice rises out of the end of the smoky mirror; that voice seems familiar, yet different somehow. I can't tell who's using it. "I just wanted to ask your advice," it says.

"My advice? Your mechanic?" the boy laughs cheerfully. But I can see that he's pleased.

"Yes, yours," the voice says. It's a female, and I can tell she's confused, as if dancing from one prospect to another. "I was hoping you could tell me something about my mother…about myself, actually. You've been here longer than I have,"

"Not likely, my dear," the boy laughs.

The voice seems speculative. "Well, in any point, you're my friend now. I've heard a lot of rumors from the other servants, and none of them seem true. Can you tell me…"

"Oh come on! Not now," Terrene snaps as fog begins cluttering up the mirror. He pounds on the glass but it doesn't help; the fog just evaporates until we're staring at our reflections again. Before it fades though I can see two sapphire spheres peering back out at me, the eyes of the voice.

"Well, he's her friend now," Terrence murmurs "At least that's promising."

"Who are they?" I ask, peering into the mirror curiously.

Terrence looks deeper into it. "The boy is Rusty. He's an insider working for me, a student that I found half starved to death on the highway. I trained him and now he acts as a double agent. This mirror acts as communication between us that Eradicus can't see, although the crack in the back of it makes it faulty. He's trying to get the female below on our side,"

"The girl?" I ask, looking into his face.

His face sours. "Evin. That's what she's called. She's an extraordinarily young girl with a massive amount of power. She's stronger than you, stronger than me…some say she's even more powerful than Trinity herself, but I don't believe it. Nobody is more powerful than my sister,"

"What's her purpose?"

"Simple. To inherit the dictatorship after Trinity. It doesn't surprise me that Trinity has managed to keep her hidden from me for this long. The mirror has just now managed to retrieve her voice, but Trinity's magic keeps me from seeing what she looks like."

"What do you mean?" I ask, my heart jumping.

Terrence looks at me. "Don't tell me you can't recognize her eyes?"

I look at my reflection in the glass. "Those eyes were the same as Yin's…and the same as my mom's."

"Exactly," Terrence says. "So do you understand now?"

"No," I ask, growing irritated.

"Ridiculous child, don't you get it!" he hissed. "Your mother used the same exact first initial of your father to name you and your sister, correct?"

"Yes," I say, breathless.

"And whose name starts with a E, if you can remember?"

All the wind has rushed out of me. All I can do is utter in a choked voice, "Eradicus?"

"That's right," Terrence says. He looks upset, furious, and brokenhearted all in one face. I finally tear my eyes away from the mirror and ask, "My mother had an affair?"

"I didn't know it myself until recently. But now you know…Evin is your half-sister."

It's quiet for a moment. I look back into the mirror and see those crystal blue eyes swimming back at me, and my heart nearly breaks too. "This is going to kill Dad," I say. "He loved her so much…"

"There may still be a chance for her," Terrence says. "You see, when my sister told you to flee from Pakavel, she made a choice to join in with the evil in order to save the civilians. You know, make a pact of power with the enemy so people won't get hurt. She grew on the idea of wickedness, however, but there is one small chance that your mother is still in there,"

"But how?" I ask. "If my real mother, the good one, is still inside and trapped, how can we manage to set her free?"

"We can't. Only Trinity can do that. We do have an option, however. There's one small chance that we can provoke the goodness in Trinity to come out,"

"How?"

"It's you," Terrence says. "If she can see you, maybe she can be reminded of the light that still lives in her, somewhere,"

"That's stupid," I say. "She threw her own daughter over a cliff! She saw me when Yin…left! She made no change of heart then!"

"Did she really see you? Did she completely and totally look you in the eye? Did you see each other face to face?"

I looked away. Come to think of it, no. I didn't think my mother ever really saw my face completely. I always was looking at her, but she was never looking at me.

"What about Yin?" I asked. "She saw her,"

Terrence frowned deeply. "Trinity never made the sacrifice for her daughter that she did for you,"

I closed my eyes. No, she never did. Trinity had stayed behind, once, used up all of her power to heal me of a terrible sickness that I didn't remember, and let her country fall. The evil inside the woman wouldn't let the real Trinity see Yin, because Trinity had never made such a deep sacrifice as she did for me. The bond between mother and daughter just wasn't enough…

No. I would refuse to believe that. There had to be another explanation.

I ball up my fists. "Alright. So where do we go from here?"

"First thing we need to do is to get you back home," Terrence says. "That is, if you're mentally stable enough to do so."

"What! No! You can't send me back! Do you have any idea what Eradicus…"

"I know he's after you, Yang," Terrence says, and my blood runs cold. "I've been tracking Eradicus' every move for months now, and let me just say that you keeping away from your family is doing nothing for the guarantee of their safety,"

"Eradicus told me if I kept out of my mother's sight he wouldn't harm them," I said.

"Eradicus lies," he says. "He will go after them even if you're not around. In fact, keeping yourself away is probably increasing their danger. They're absolutely miserable. You saw them! They need you,"

"Nobody needs me," I chuckle slowly.

"Yes, we do," Terrence says. "Yang, you're the most important part of this entire war. If we can show you to your mother there may still be a chance we can show her the error of her ways. You're the only hope we have. Keeping you alive is our number one priority."

"So no more jumping off bridges then, I take it," I say with the blackest humor I have. He doesn't find it funny, and neither do I.

"You have to understand me, boy," Terrence says. "Whatever the cost may be, you must stay alive."

_MMEEEEPP! Review please, I must know your deepest most darkest plot interpretations! Or...whatever. You know the drill. Meep._


	12. Coming Back and Going Again

"So boy," Terrence asked as he began packing away his things. "You ready to go home?"

I made no answer. I reluctantly put away my things inside my suitcase, having to stuff inside all the extra stuff Terrence had bought me. It wasn't like I didn't appreciate the extra clothes; but he had seriously underestimated my size, and everything that he gave me was short sleeved and hung off me like drapes. He disapproved, naturally, that I was so thin and that I didn't have much muscle. It would surprise him how much strength I actually had.

"Unfortunately," he added, "I'm going to have to come along and live with your family for awhile. You see it's not very safe for me to stay in one place too long and…what is that on your wrist?"

"Nothing," I said quickly, pulling my sleeve down over a broken heart that I had drawn on my arm. I had doodled it there in boredom yesterday and, not thinking, had gone over it several times with a black marker. Now it was sticking and it wasn't coming off.

He looked at me for a long while, then turned his back and shook his head. The apartment was pretty much cleared out; Terrence left the furniture to be sold with the room and almost everything else he had gotten rid of. The only things he had with him were three full bags and the mirror, which was covered in the long black fabric.

"Help me carry this thing downstairs and into the car, and be careful! This mirror's worth more than my skin and yours," he told me.

"Hardly." I rolled my eyes. This thing was _heavy; _I was going to break my back just lifting it. We lugged the thing down the stairs and into the car, Terrence fondling over the thing like it was a baby.

"Ready to go?" He asked. Everything else had already been packed inside and loaded up. I reluctantly put my hand on the door; it was too soon, and there would be too many questions…

"We don't have all day here. It's a five hour car ride, you know," Terrence said, rolling his eyes. I sighed and just got in, not exactly looking forward to the long drive. I didn't look back as we pulled away.

*

"Hey. Hey kid, wake up. We're here," Terrence said, jostling me with his hand. I groggily lifted my head off the car seat and looked around, a pit of dread filling up my stomach. The drive had been too short. I must have dropped off around a hour into it; I was exhausted.

"You sure made up for the sleep you missed last night," Terrence joked. "You pretty much knocked yourself out and didn't even twitch for hours. No nightmares, I take it?"

I shook my head. The sleep had been blank and devoid of all thought, exactly what I needed, an escape from the world. All last night had been spent tossing and turning, pondering on what I was going to say to my father. I had nearly gotten asleep around two, comforted with the thought that Rain wouldn't care no matter what I had done, only to be jolted awake again with the terrifying possibility that even when I did return, her sanity would not. What if her confusion wasn't temporary, and I had ended up making Rain mad for good?

"Just leave your stuff in here, we'll get it later," Terrence said. He opened the door for me and I crawled out, taking in the various scents and windy air. Home.

Terrence didn't take long getting to the door. He was up the steps before I could even lift a foot upon them and was racking on it like he was going to a party instead of a relation's. I heard my irritated dad grumble, look out the keyhole, and finally wrench open the door. "Doggone it Terrence, can't you keep it down? I have a headache…"

"Oh, I never knock that loudly usually. Only for you," Terrence said with a smile. Dad grouched some more before his eyes landed on me. They traveled up and down me for a minute before softening into sadness and relief. He reached out his arm and beckoned to me. "Come on child. You're home now."

_Home. _The word sang out slowly in my heart again. I stepped inside and he put his arm around me, not bothering to hold the door open for Terrence. Although I knew there were things I'd have to answer for later (the bridge loomed formidably in my mind) at the moment I was content and calm.

"Pretty nice place you got here," Terrence said, observing the house. "But it's nothing that a duke should have to reside in,"

"Shut up bonehead," Dad whispered under his breath and I smiled lightly. We turned into the living room and I paused in my tracks, every inch of me frozen in place.

Rain had her back to me, mumbling happily to herself and playing with plastic bags wrapped around her hands in the imitation of puppets. I looked to Dad helplessly; he leaned in closer and said, "She thinks they're real. Been sitting here since I got up, and if I try to budge her she throws a fit."

"Is there anything we can do?" I asked, pleading.

"I can't," he said. "But you can." He pushed me forward and I crept up behind her, observing how she looked. She was a mess; her hair was all wild and tangled and there were stains on her clothes as if she had eaten like a baby all this time. She obviously had skipped all her baths and I could sense something wild in her; something untamed, like the feral snow leopard that she could change into.

Yet even then she was the most beautiful thing I had seen in weeks. I grasped the locket at my throat and whispered, "Rain,"

She paused in her play. She turned around slowly to meet me, her eyes traveling from the floor to my face. Once she met my eyes her face lit up, and she sprang from the ground, laying a gentle hand on my face. I smiled lightly at her; she beamed back, then at an instant, her clothes exploded and a great white leopard tackled me to the floor.

*

"Insane," Terrence mumbled. "Attacking a prince like that."

We were eating dinner a few days later. Dad glared at Terrence from across the table as I picked at my food, trying to eat. It wasn't coming easy for me. Rain just watched me consume, her eyes delighted at the fact that she could see me again. I never had to be concerned about Rain's sanity; the instant she saw me she continued to get better and better, and at the moment she was speaking full sentences and nearly back to her old self. Being Rain she never asked questions, just accepted the fact that I was here again. That was good enough for her. I knew it wasn't good enough for Dad though. He still hadn't brought up the whole leaping off the bridge thing, and that worried me.

"I don't mind," I said, shrugging. Rain had only done it out of play and it wasn't like I hadn't deserved it. "She's my friend."

Terrence shook his head and ranted on. I don't think anybody was listening, really. When he was done he looked at me and said, "So kid, how long do you think your old man's going to let me stay? A month? Two?"

Dad spit out part of his drink. He wiped his mouth and said, "You're not staying in this house."

"Excuse me? I'm your brother in law! Is this how you're going to treat me, after I let you marry my sister?"

_Let you?_ My mind raged, but Dad made no comment about that. He just stared Terrence down and put aside his cup. "You're not staying," Dad said. "None of us are."

There was a ripple of confusion between Terrence and I. I glanced at Rain and she frowned, as if she had known this was coming.

"We uh…" Dad looked uncomfortable. "I had to sell the house. The medial bills were getting extremely high and if I didn't do something then we were going to go under."

"What are you saying man? A prince can't live on the streets!" Terrence shouted, pointing to me.

"That's ironic, because that's exactly what I've been doing for weeks," I whispered to Rain. She giggled.

"Are you forgetting I'm royalty too?" Dad said, crossing his arms.

"Ooh, the duke of Condolet. Big whoop. Last time I heard they threw you out," Terrence rolled his eyes. "Technically I'm the banished king of Pakavel, but at least my own people don't threaten that they're going to kill me!"

"No, only your own sister does," Dad hissed.

Terrence put his hands on the table and began rising from his chair. I interceded and said, "Woah, woah, back up! We're losing our house?"

"Most likely," Dad confirmed. "Now that…your mother…is on the loose it would be best we relocate anyway."

"Hey genius, Eradicus is still alive," Terrence said. Dad's eyes widened and he said, "Impossible! How could this be?"

"Tell you later," I said quickly. "But where are we going to live?"

Dad rubbed his hand on his neck. "The only place that's safe enough for us to go to now is Condolet."

"Oh you've got to be kidding me!" Terrence said. He got up from his chair and began pacing around angrily. "Where did your brains go? Do you honestly think that they're going to let you back home so easily?"

"No," Dad said. "I only have one option. I have to make them change their minds and confirm me leader."

"Brilliant," Terrence said. He rubbed his hand on his head and said, "This is going to make things even harder for the mirror to see…"

There was an epic and most terrible silence. Dad seemed shocked and infuriated at the same time. I had never seen him so angry before, and it was scaring me. Rain looked back and forth between them, her eyes finally landing on me. She too looked frightened, but not for herself.

"Are you insane? You had the mirror all this time and you never thought of _telling me_?" Dad said, outraged.

"I had to! If everybody in the county knew I had that thing my head would be sitting on a platter!"

"For your information, your head's already been fitted for a platter, yours and mine. And who said I was going to spread it around the county! I'm your ally!"

"As if," Terrence snorted. My father got up too and Rain and I slunk closer together. I didn't like the way her eyes were glittering furiously.

"We're going to Condolet," Dad said. "You can come with us or not…"

"If you think I'm going to leave my sister's poor kid in your hands again, you've got another thing coming-"

"It doesn't matter to me." He finished. "We'll go, I'll be made king, and that's that. Afterwards, who knows?

"Who wants a sickly old man to lead them anyway?" Terrence snapped. I gasped and a huge flicker of anger boiled up in me; this was too much. My hands shaking I got up to rise from the table; but Rain got there first.

With a rippling snarl of fang and fur she was once again leopard, jumping up and scattering food everywhere as she growled at the two men, her teeth glistening white in the light. I stepped away from the table and she growled, coming down from the table and backing both into a corner. Then an amazing thing happened; Rain the leopard opened her mouth and spoke.

"Get away," she rumbled. "Get away. I'm his protector. Leave."

With everyone speechless Rain looked at me. I said, "Come on," and we walked out of the room. When we had gotten to her room I began ruffling through her drawers, trying to find something for her to wear.

"You didn't have to do that," I said, turning around with a black dress in my arms.

"I _hate_ seeing you upset," she growled. "Close your eyes." I did so, waiting for her to change. When she was finished she said, "Okay, you can open them." She was sitting on her bed with the window open and her eyes glazed over. Outside, a gentle snow was starting to fall.

She shivered. The dress I had gotten her was a tank top sundress made for summer. Shows you how much I know about clothing. "Here, let me get that for you," I said.

I shut the window and sat by her side, both of us staring at the white beginning to drift downward. I could tell she was still freezing.

"Here," I said. I took off my jacket and draped it over her shoulders lightly. It felt like if I touched her a bomb would go off somewhere. Probably inside my heart. It was stupid, giving her my jacket when we were in her room, but both of us were too lazy to get up and get her own.

She looked at me oddly. "Do not you feel uncomfortable, with your scars?"

"Not with you," I said. She smiled back at me and took my one arm, tracing over the marks with small fingers. "Your skin is cold," she said.

I shrugged. "It doesn't bother me." I would never let anyone else touch me like this, on the cut marks. The house was quiet, impenetrable in its silence. While she was touching a particularly nasty scar she asked, "They never stop arguing. Why is this so?"

It wasn't until she stopped tracing my arm that I realized she had asked a question. I flushed with embarrassment, trying to shove down the fluttery, wonderful swooping in my stomach and the tingling feeling that was spreading to particular places…

"I guess…I guess the reason that they fight so much was because they both loved my mom a lot. They both wanted the best for her, just had different ideas of how to achieve it." I shrugged.

"They didn't realize that they could love her equally," Rain said. "It was kinda…it was sort of that way between Yin and I."

I looked at her in surprise. She gulped and said, "When your sister was alive both of us were very protective of you. We used to fight behind your back on what would make you happy. I told her that we could both watch out for you, but she never really trusted me. I don't think she liked the fact that I wasn't willing to hand you over to her the day Eradicus attacked you."

"Yeah," I said. "I know that ticked her off pretty badly."

"I really did like her, you know," Rain said. "I wanted to be her friend, but she wouldn't have it. She thought I was taking you away from her."

"And she used to say I got jealous," I chuckled.

It was silent for a minute. Rain got up off her chair and said, "Thank you for listening to me. I know how hard it is for you to talk about her."

I don't reply. Before she leaves the room she turns and asks, "If you don't mind me asking…how many days has it been?"

"Since what?" I said.

"Since you last cut," she said.

I thought, counting the time on my fingers. "Ten days."

She nods. "I can help you keep track, if you want."

"Thank you Rain," I say in appreciation. "That would help."

*

About a week later we're all packed into my dad's tiny car, me and Rain smushed against each other in the backseat because of all the suitcases we had to shove back here. I can't help but admit that I'm enjoying the close contact, with my arm always resting directly against hers, but it came at a price. Terrence had to sell his car in order to get us more money for the trip, which he absolutely loathed having to do; if I heard one more thing about the dumb car, I was going to scream. So basically I was caught between heaven with Rain right next to me, and pure heck as Dad and Terrence kept snapping at each other in the front. I'm trying to distract myself from Rain's prettiness (I'm not supposed to like her anyway, remember?) by looking at the realm we were now in.

It was wide, vast, and open. Rolling plains extended everywhere as mountains erupted against the beautiful mist and bamboo sprouted in every nook and cranny; this place was the poster child for tranquility.

"Look around Yang," Dad said and he extended his hand over the landscape. "This is your heritage. Half of it, I should say. This is the land where your ancestors roamed. Great warriors have come from here, and I have to say you're almost exactly like them."

"Yeah right," Terrence says. "Don't you listen to your daddy boy, you're Pakavelian through and through. It shows in your face."

Rain and I look at each other, my face scrunched in annoyance and hers twisted in slight irritation. Dad and Terrence argued more than any two people I have ever known. There was only one exception to this rule…Yin and I.

"How many days has it been?" Rain asks through her teeth, trying to ignore the arguing.

"Fourteen," I say, strained. It hasn't helped that I can hardly stop thinking of the blade. I can't look at her face; I'd be too ashamed.

Dad and Terrence's voices keep getting louder and louder. I close my eyes, trying to shut out the pain; then something happens that I don't expect. I feel a soft, gentle hand close upon my own and squeeze it softly, as if joining us into one being. I look into Rain's face with amazement and she gives me a hopeful smile. I nod back at her and we don't let go, though I understand I shouldn't be doing this. Yet what's so bad about hand holding, really? It's not like we're dating or anything, she's just trying to comfort me. Doing her job as a friend.

It's not long before an elaborate stone wall rises up above us. The car passes through and we are inside a large city made entirely out of cold stone. It looks like somebody set off a bomb of humans; we came from no people to hundreds in an instant. I look around the luggage and see that people are crowding the road, the car straining to fit through the city streets.

"Welcome to Condolet," Terrence said glumly. "Metropolitan sprawl and party central."

I couldn't disagree with that. I had never seen so many people in my life. They crowded every inch of the rock city, dancing and fighting with one another, selling fruits and exotic fare. Rain looked nervous; she didn't like all these people around her. It was my turn for me to comfort her. I squeezed her hand tightly and she looked at me, the panic vanishing from her eyes as she stared into my face.

"Hang on tight kids," Dad said. "It's going to be a long drive."

That was an understatement. With all the crowds, it took hours to inch just a few feet. That wasn't the worst part though; some strange man came slamming on my window once and tried to open the door. Rain screamed and Dad rolled down the window an inch, blowing the dude away with his magic. I recoiled against Rain, and she shivered against me. I think if we had hit the streets it would have been safer than staying here.

It took forever to get through these passes. By the time the mob had thinned out Rain had fallen asleep against my shoulder. We were pulling out of the city now; the plains were returning and I stared, open mouthed in awe at what lay before me.

A large, gray looking stone castle was reaching up to the sky, it's turrets and red flags climbing up to the clouds. It was heavy looking, demanding, and not even half as beautiful as the broken palace of Pakavel, but nobody would make the mistake of attacking it, that was for sure. I gently shook Rain awake and she looked up, clearly not as impressed as I was…but then, why would she be? She had lived in a palace all her life, unlike me, who could only remember snippets of the castle that had been my home for years.

"Take caution now, children," Dad said. He stopped the car and we looked up at a stern iron gate that was hovering above us. "My royalty status will let me through the gate but further than that, it won't protect us here. Tread carefully, and if I tell you to run, you run."

With regret I let go of Rain's hand and I got out of the car, keeping my father's words in mind. I couldn't slip up here. No matter what happened, I was a prince, and people would be watching my every move. One slip up could mean my very life, or worse, the lives of those I loved. I now needed to remember I was royalty, and I needed to act like it.

_Happy New Year y'all! YYEEEEEHAAWWWW!!!! 2010 alright, sounds good. Now, please please please PLEASE review! We're coming to the end here, but there will be a few more surprises along the way…and also some story art! Keep your eye on my profile for when I put it up (if I can get this scanner to work…*ugh…shuffle, sounds of beating machine*. Anyway, also be on the lookout for a surprise from me…if it comes soon! I'm not telling you anything ;)_


	13. The King of Condolet

As I was standing around waiting for everybody to get prepared I took a small picture out of my pocket that I had drawn on the way there, using various colored pencils and paper that I still had from an old notebook of mine. Rain was thankfully asleep when I had drawn this, for I didn't want her to see what was on this paper. It was a picture of me and her, with various commentary of my own written on it.

"What's that?" she asked, peeking over my shoulder.

"Oh nothing," I hurriedly said, and stuffed it inside my pocket again. There were secrets on there she couldn't know about. Whatever happened, I would be carrying it with me no matter what, that and the locket around my neck.

"Put this on," Dad said, and he handed me a fair blue robe with a hood. "Cast it over your face, and don't pull it down until I tell you to."

I did as I was told, noticing that both Terrence and Dad were pulling robes out of the trunk and putting them over their normal clothes, to cover up our shabby clothing. Rain got out a shimmering white cape and wrapped it around her shoulders. She could have fooled anyone; she looked precisely like a queen from the way she proudly held her head, but it was obvious that I was no royal by my lumbering trot.

"Stand up straight," Dad said. "Act like you're somebody."

Terrence grimaced and pulled his green robe tighter around him. I noticed he never took his hand off a small dagger in his belt. "Alright people, it's show time. Let the games begin."

The courtyard was not as beautiful as Pakavel's, but it as massive nonetheless; the grass was cut to a perfect length and ivy crawled up the stone walls in nearly perfect sections. Everything was so green…where was all the color? I tried walked ahead of the group but Terrence shoved me behind, and then I understood; I was violating the royal status quo. As my elders I had to let the adults go first, then trail behind. I went through the royal laws in my mind and reeled…there were so many! How could I possibly remember them all…yet I remembered that since I was a prince, I could talk to whoever I wanted to, as long as a superior wasn't in my presence. That would mean Terrence, as the banished king of Pakavel, and my dad, for even though he was just a duke, he had fathered me, so that made me under him. I couldn't say a word or make a false move unless they told me to. A thought ran through my head and I realized that Rain, being a recently freed slave, would have little better treatment than a palace servant. I glanced back at her to see she was walking behind me, with her lips tightly clenched; she hadn't forgotten anything.

Dad led us to a certain square table set up in the middle of a courtyard, with a bunch of squabbling people yelling at each other furiously. It looked like a very heated discussion. My dad clasped his hands and waited, not moving an inch even when all conversation halted and they glared at him with penetrating, horrid eyes.

All of them were male. The oldest of them, a white haired man with a patchy looking robe, rose up from the table. "So, you've decided to return? At the cost of you life,"

"I hardly think so Bennet," Dad said icily. "I've changed my mind about the position of the job."

"Too late! You've had your chance," Some young guy in armor protested. "Now it's our turn."

Dad blinked. "I've come at the mercy of the court. My family and I have nowhere to go. By royal law you are required to offer us some sort of shelter."

"You forfeited that right when you refused to take the crown! Now someone get a guard to run him through!" the armor clad man exclaimed.

"Ulan! You should be ashamed of yourself!" a red haired man said, shocked. "These are our friends, not our enemies!"

"Be quiet, Roan. You know nothing of what we are talking about," Bennet said, staring my dad down. I noticed he had a hand on a hilt at his belt. So this was the one who had thrown the sword.

Dad wasn't swayed by the minor threat. "If you kill me, it will be well protected by our laws, yet it will be detrimental to your cause, Bennet. You know that you cannot murder me. After all, I know too much about the enemy. You need me."

Bennet glared back at him, but everyone around him seemed to know this was true. He slammed his hand down on the table and said, "Alright, I'll admit it, we need you! Trinity's got us cornered, and you're the only one who know how she thinks. But you're not staying in the palace, I can guarantee you that much. You are no better than a servant in our book…"

As he rambled on my mind seemed to wander. All of this was pointless to me, a simple chasing after the wind compared to everything that had happened in the past few months. My fifteenth birthday was nearing, and it would be the first one that I would be celebrating alone…

Nearby, away from the stables, a black horse was rearing and fighting with three different groomsmen trying to yank it down. My stomach clenched and I sympathized. I knew exactly how it felt, for I was in the same situation. I peered closer. That horse looked familiar, as if I had seen it somewhere before…

"On an even worse note, you've brought him here!" Ulan cried, throwing a finger in Terrence's direction and my attention was brought back towards the argument. "A filthy Pakavelian!"

"Watch what you're saying, or I'll cut your tongue right out of your throat," Terrence threatened.

"Terrence," Dad said in warning. Terrence bared his teeth but kept silent.

"Leave now, Yomen. You're not welcome here," the Ulan said as a last threat, furious.

There was a silence. Then, without a second warning, Dad moved aside and nodded his head. I grabbed the hood and threw it back, causing even the blades of grass ripple with shock. The entire council gasped when they saw the resemblance in my vibrant, violet eyes.

"Are you insane!?" Bennet hissed, his fingers clawing into the wood of the table and recoiling away from my sight as if I carried a virus. "You brought Trinity's spawn _here_? Could you have made us a bigger target?"

"I would prefer that you didn't refer to my son in such a manner," Dad said coldly. He was getting angry now, and diving into protective-father mode.

"Well this is fantastic!" Ulan screamed. "Bringing that…that…boy into our land, right under Trinity's eyesight, will cause us to be ransacked! Houses will be burned, battles fought, and Condolet will be torched within the week!"

"Have you no mind?" Terrence asked. He strode right up to the table and knocked it over, causing men to leap back and chairs to go flying. He whirled on them all and yelled, "This boy is the key to this fight! He needs to be protected, and if you cannot hide him, you are all doomed!"

"We are doomed anyway," another man moaned. "How can we hope to stand up to Eradicus and Trinity together? It was hard enough going when there was one of them!"

"By keeping this child alive," Terrence whispered harshly. "There may be a chance. Trinity has one weak point now, and that is him."

"So what are we saying? Do we use the boy?" another voiced.

All eyes turned to me. I could tell they were scanning me over, trying to figure out ways to make me be their pawn…it made me feel unclean.

"Trinity isn't getting her hands on him," Dad said, and he laid a protective hand on my shoulder. "Nor are any of you. Now you can take us in and hide us, using our knowledge to give us all a sliver of hope, or you can throw us out and condemn us all. What is your choice?"

The council was silent, and all eyes turned to Bennett. He shook and spat, "Alright. The boy must stay, I can see it now. But you make sure that his filthy paws stays within the lower realms…"

"There will be no need for that," Terrence said. "Since the boy has a right now to become king."

The entire courtyard went silent and I felt like someone had punched me in the gut. Dad took a step forward and said, "Now that can't be right, he's only fourteen…"

"The boy king Dominine took the throne at the age of three many years ago, if I can remember correctly. If the records are right, the child is destined to take the throne."

I stared blankly at him, my mind whirling. So this had been his intention all along. To make me king so he could help control the throne to bring down his sister. He used me…he used me. How unfair was it that my own uncle had set me up like this!

"Well…" Bennett blundered. "If this is to be true, then he first must prove himself. We are just about to do the ceremony for deciding who shall be king." He motioned to the groom hands fighting with the horse and they dragged the poor thing over to the council.

"How shall you decide?" Dad asked. The color had left his face and I could tell he was hoping it was some impossible task that I would fail at. I was hoping so too.

"How it always is," the man said. "Whoever can calm this wild beast will be our leader. It's been that way for centuries,"

"Bit old fashioned, don't you think?" Dad mumbled. Everyone ignored him.

My stomach clenched. I hadn't been around a horse in years. Have I forgotten everything about them that I had known when I forgot all my memories of Pakavel? Looking around at my contenders, I saw that each and every one of them had a patch of a horse running across their shoulder. Valiant horsemen. What chance did I have?

"Ulan will go first," Bennett said. He beamed at him and I saw that he was the obvious favorite. Ulan strode up cockily to the horse and the grooms backed off, letting go of the multiple lead ropes. I saw that the horse (he was a gelding) had scars all over his body and his face. Ulan grabbed a hold of the rope and tired yanking the animal down but he reared up higher and struck out with his hooves. Ulan growled and hit him on his side, and I flinched. The gelding kicked out and hit Ulan on the chest, sending him flying.

"Ah well," Bennett said in obvious disappointment, watching the grooms chase and catch the now loose horse. "It was not meant to be, then. Who shall go next?"

So it continued. Some were mean and rough like Ulan had been, and others were kind and gentle, but none of them could calm the horse. Sunset was starting to fall ad still nobody had succeeded. It went on and on, but all failed and no matter how hard I prayed none of them could quiet the creature. When it came my turn, maybe I would do the same…no. No, I would purposely mess up worse than the others. That would make sure I could never take the throne. Finally, there was only me left.

"Well, there's no other option," Roan said. "Let the lad try."

Dad's face was strained and pale. Terrence's was encouraging, pushing me to try. I looked back at Rain, who had hardly moved at all; in her soft gaze I found comfort. Even if I as to become king, I was still the same to her. I saw how she looked at the horse and felt sorry for it; my plan to purposefully scare the animal fell to the side and I nodded to her. I wouldn't let her down.

I inched forward and wondered how I was going to do this. Unlike with the others the horse didn't take off, just stared at me, as if it was remembering something, trying to figure something out. I knew this horse, but how? Something was in those soft, dark eyes…something ancient and bonding.

Then it clicked. Tears came to my eyes and I whispered in a calm voice, "Shiuh."

The gelding's ears pricked up. He moved forward closer to me, step by step. He flinched a bit when I (very, very slowly) laid a hand on his cheek but he did not pull away as with the others. I can gotten farther then the others. I cautiously went to his side and blew in his nose, whistling a soft tune. I hadn't forgotten anything, and neither had he.

He enjoyed the greeting. I put my head to his and buried it in his mane. I began to walk forward and he followed me, keeping in sync with my steps. I came to a halt and he did so as well, and now the water was running clearly down my face. "Shiuh…"

"You've got to be kidding me," Ulan snapped. "His voice isn't even fully developed yet! This is a boy, not a man!"

The rest of the council went silent. Bennett cleared his throat, looking around, and it was clear he had no choice. He couldn't break the law, and neither could I. I understood I had sealed my fate the instant I saw Rain's sympathetic stare. Bennett turned to Roan and said, "Tell the people Condolet has a celebration to plan. We have found our king."

_Tehehehee…I laugh. I've got the picture that Yang drew right here but I'm struggling with how to upload it to my profile here…does anybody know how to do that? The surprise is coming, along with a few more chapters…but I'm keeping quiet about that! _


	14. A Never Ending Nightmare

"Leave us be!" Dad shouted at the servants outside the barn door before slamming it shut. He turned in immense fury, but not at me nor at Rain, but the only other person along in the stable with us, Terrence.

"What have you done?" Dad asked, and he strode up to Terrence, glaring at him with every inch of his anger. "Do you have any idea _what you have done???"_

"Perfectly." He moved not an inch away from my father's stance.

"Madness," Rain whispered at my side. "Madness, I tell you."

I said nothing. After Benett had announced me king he had led us through the various rooms and systems of the castle, showing every room and nook and cranny and I don't know what else of the place. I had to absorb it all in quickly, try to make sense of everything he was telling me about the council and politics and court life and I don't know what else as I tried to memorize the many catacombs of the palace. It was a lot bigger than Pakavel's had been, and a lot more menacing. There were few windows in the place, and far too much stone. If there were any decorations, they were of war heroes or battle items. It was obvious these people had little room for merriment. I doubted I would be able to find my way through the dark hallways and up to my room. Terrence, Rain and Dad had all followed me in their wake, Dad never growing calmer with any step, but only more furious. Terrence wore a stone mask of indifference; Rain never took her concerned eyes off of me. After the dinner that I had been served and many more hours of dull, big-worded conversation with many officials I didn't know, I was finally informed that the tour was over. It was about midnight now, and I had walked back here to see Shiuh, to let him glance over the dead, lifelessness in my eyes. I stood in his rope stall now, caressing his side and wishing that I could be him, instead of me.

"He's a king now," Dad said, walking away and throwing his hand in my direction. "A. King. He's got to run this country. Do you have any sort of idea for his welfare at all? He's stressed enough as it is, and you want to load a failing country on his back now?"

"It was my fault," I said softly. "I calmed Shiuh."

"Don't even try to blame this on yourself Yang!" Rain snapped, suddenly very infuriated. She strode right up to Terrence with a look on her face of such ill will that it didn't matter that Rain was decades younger, several feet shorter and psychically much weaker. Hay swept up and around her feet in submerged tufts of wind and her ruffled back from her face; Terrence took a step back and I was shocked. He was afraid of her.

"I can't believe it…" Dad said, and he began pacing again. "My son…the teenage monarch."

"You knew it was a possibility," I said, raising my eyes to meet his. "You knew I could have been chosen."

Dad paused in his steps. Then he knelt down to look me in the eyes, taking my face in his hands gently. "You are a fourteen year old boy," he said. "A boy who has just lost his sister, after losing his mother, and may soon lose his father as well,"

"Don't say that," I said, panicking. I'm pretty sure I can't handle another loss.

"The chances of you being picked were…not even possible. I never considered it. The only reason you're accepted is…is because of your eyes, and who you are." He stated. "The violet gaze is one of a true blooded Condolet royal. You were automatically given half preference because of it. I thought this would be disregarded, however, because of your age…but it seems that I was blind. It's your mother…they think you can stop her."

"No they don't," I said. I had remembered the way they had spoken to me at dinner, the loathing, fearful, and even sympathetic speech they had cast my way. "They think I'm going to die trying. They want a martyr, and maybe once I'm out of the way she'll spare their little kingdom. They're not much of a threat if I'm gone, now are they?"

There was silence, as this idea was true. Shiuh put his head closer to mine, and I inhaled his breath, trying to make some magic out of the chaos that was being thrown at me. Rain took a deep, shuddering breath. She then rounded on Terrence again. "You planned this," She said, shaking. "You planned this all along!"

"Of course I did!" Terrence said, finally breaking through his wall of stone. "You're such a child, what other way could there possibility be in order to put him directly in my sister's eye line?"

"You want Trinity to see him?" Dad roared. "Trinity? Do you have any idea what she could do to him?"

"I freaking cut myself, for crying out loud!" I yelled. "Do you really think I can run a country?"

"That's not my intention," Terrence said. "Please see it from my point of view. I'm just trying to help, and what does it matter if this country falls…"

"It means thousands of innocent people will die!" I snapped, then shut my eyes tightly. People, I had to remind myself, that I was now responsible for. I, a emotional ball of hormones, that a bunch of old people wanted to crown king. My hands were balled up into fists, clinging onto Shiuh's mane. I had to keep calm…

My eyes flared as I opened them. "Get out."

"What?" Terrence's face was one of complete confusion.

"I order you to get out, or I will call the guards. Leave me alone, and don't come to me again until I am ready," I said, my voice strong. He wanted me to be a king. Well, I was acting like it.

Terrence stared at me for a shot few seconds before turning on his heels and exiting the barn. I turn back to Shuih and begin stroking him again, trying to draw some comfort from my horse's calm, steady breathing.

I rest my head against Shiuh's neck. "Yin would've known what to do," I say. "She would have made a better ruler than I'm gonna be."

"Isn't there a way he can get out of it?" Rain pleads with my Dad. He goes to answer, but my lips part and I utter a single, unspeakable word.

"No."

Rain and Dad both pause, staring at me in horror. I stare blankly back at them, feeling nothing but rage, and a fire consuming me inside.

"I'm tired of running," I say, and it seems a regal air has entered my voice, a divider between right and wrong. "It's time I stood up to my mother. She's taken everything from me, and everything from my people. Well now I want it back, and I'm going to fight her until I die trying."

"Yang," Dad states.

"Go to bed, Dad," I tell him. "You shouldn't be up this late. You're sick. Please…go." My dismissal runs cold, and hurt, he leaves me with a defeated and tired air.

Rain lets her hair fall in front of her face. "Do you want me to leave, too?"

I almost tell her to leave me be, let me contemplate things like a chilling, articulating leader. Almost. "No," I say. "I don't want you to."

"Is that an order?" she says harshly.

I turn to her. I look her in the eyes and say, "You're a free girl, Rain. You take orders from no one."

She blinks back at me, then sits on a hay bale, staring up at the moon outside the stall window and humming a low, mournful song. Her face is downcast, worried, and nearly defeated. I continue petting Shiuh, and that is how we pass the night.

*

Everyone here treats me like I have some sort of disease, or some sort of miracle cure. I can't tell if they want to worship me or spit at my feet. On one hand, I am their cherished idol, the one they hope to set before Trinity in order quench her wrath. On the other hand, I'm a filthy Pakavelian, with no ideas about the rules that govern their state. Not to mention a boy…a child going around telling his elders what to do. The blindest leading the blind. I'm forced to sacrifice my free time for constant meetings, endless demands, and have to shove myself into these scratchy and extravagant clothes that I hate to wear. I haven't seen much of Terrence lately since I've banished him from my sight. Oppositely, Dad makes sure I never leave his. He's terrified I'm going to make a mistake that's going to cause us all to sink. These days have also shortened my time with Rain; every hour away from her is a longing, a pain that is aching to satisfy. Even if I can't be with her, it's nice at least to call her my friend and to see her. The way things are going though, it's hard to even get that. With all this royalty stuff, its no wonder my mom went to the dark side.

"We should plan our defense here," a man says at my first council meeting, pointing to a point on a map that is fastened on the board. We're making battle strategies, and every thing I think feels like a mistake. To make up for what I don't have in war experience, Dad is sitting beside me, an honorary member of the council. I'm letting him speak for me because obviously, I don't want to make a foolish suggestion in front of everyone. But there's something glaring at me from the map, that nobody else seems to see, so I have to speak up.

"Wouldn't it be better if we defended the south?" I say. "There's a huge gap that's left unprotected."

"But there would be no shield from the onslaught of the raiders in the mountains!" Ulan says, totally forgetting who I am. "We need to focus on what's coming in over there, not down where nothing is happening!"

"He's right," Dad says, and nods his head at me. I shut my mouth, look at the table, and keep silent.

"We'll be planning your coronation feast soon, your highness. What kind of fish do you want served as the main entrée?" My personal planner Pierre asks later in the day.

"Um…can't we just have beef Wellington instead?" I ask, hoping that this was a good enough substitute.

Pierre looks at me, scribbles something on his sheet, then walks away muttering as if I had done him a personal offence.

*

"Yang! Yang, wake up! Stop screaming and wake up!"

I sit up with a gasp, drawing in air as if I was drowning in the very essence of fear. My whole body is shaking and I'm still sort of trapped in my dreams, the visions swirling before my eyes in this room.

"It's a bad dream," Dad said slowly, putting a hand on my back and trying to make me focus on his voice. "Just a bad dream."

I take more deep breaths and try to calm down. I'm trembling so hard it's making the bed quiver.

"That's right," Dad says. "Now…now just lie down and don't think about it. It's all okay."

I put my head back on the pillow and pretend that I believe him.

*

We're in Terrence's room again, for about the second time that week. There's a rough sort of tension between Terrence and I as we look deep into the mirror, something that we have managed to keep hidden from all the palace officials. Nobody but Dad, my uncle, Rain and I know that there's something else hidden in the black mirror. That it's just not an ordinary object.

We've been watching for hours, but nothing much is happening. Mostly we're just seeing the fog that is covering up the face of the mysterious Evin, and watching the apprentice called Rusty talk to her. It's all about useless things…nothing that would help us in our conquest…at least, not yet.

Something strikes me about this servant, that I've seen this common boy before dressed in oil and grease. He seems very close to Evin…another strike against him. I never really liked him in the first place, but being an apprentice to Terrence is already a reason to dislike him.

I know, I know, not very Christian. But I've seen this boy. I know I have. And he's bad news. You can tell just by the look on his face.

That red hair looks like it's been dyed, and very poorly. The boy's face looks so young, and similar to mine. Yet he's stronger, and more bulky although we're almost the same height.

"Where have I seen those eyes before…" I murmured. Rusty's eyes were the murkiest amber, and now that I looked closely, the way he smiled at the shadowed Evin showed teeth that had the tiniest little points to them. Those were familiar too…

"I know that guy, but I'm not sure from where," I said to my Dad. "Who is he?"

My dad's face darkened. So he too, knew this other boy. "It would be better, son, if you never found out. Don't trouble yourself."

"But…"

"It'd only make you upset if you knew," Dad said, clapping a hand on my shoulder. "Just be glad that he's on our side now. He's a really powerful ally, and I'm keeping tags on him, even if Terrence is not. Don't get involved."

He left me there to stare into the mirror. I cocked my head and stared deeper into that face. Yes, he was familiar all right…those amber eyes showed that. On our side now? Did that mean he was evil before?

I left the mirror where it stood, racking my brain and trying to remember.

*

That night I travel down the corridor, carrying a drawing journal that Dad got for me last year on my birthday. There are raised voices down the hall; I flatten myself against it and perk up my hearing to see what's up.

"This is absurdity!" Rain shouted. "He should be free to be a teenager like everybody else! You are being very unfair to him!"

"Do you think I had a choice?" Dad screamed back at her, and I shrunk down; Dad never yelled at Rain. "What are we supposed to do? There's nowhere to run, and nowhere to hide. If we leave the entire kingdom is doomed, and you know it."

"Can that be helped?"

"Of course it can! We may still have a chance."

"I believe in his abilities to do it of course, but now? He's still grieving for his sister, and so are you!"

I knew Dad was turning away from her. "I can't deny that," he whispered. "My beautiful daughter…"

Rain was quiet. Her footsteps backed up carefully and she said, "Do you believe the darkness can lead us into light?"

There was such a pause that you'd have thought that the floor had turned to ice. "You know?"

"Of course I do! The way you named your twins…so unjustified. Yin, the light, the positive and Yang, the darkness, the negative. You thought that she was going to be the one to save us all? Well take a look around, great master, because Everlightayin has vanished from this earth and Nightstaryang is now the leader of the resistance!"

Dad coughed. "Leave me," he wheezed. Rain let out a digusted sound and was there no more; I put my back against the wall and clenched my journal so hard to my arms that my scars throbbed.

*

You ever feel like you're screaming from the inside out, but that the pained yell within takes so much effort that you are gagged and unable to say anything in the real world to lessen your anguish?

Can souls bleed? Can spirits bleed?

All I want to know is WHEN WILL IT END??? WHEN WILL THE SUFFERING FINALLY BE OVER, WHEN WILL I MYSELF AND ALL THOSE AROUND ME CEASE TO SUFFER, WHEN ALL THIS SHADOW AND POVERTY AND PAIN AND SICKNESS WILL LEAVE FOREVER TO NEVER RETURN? I AM POWERLESS TO DO ANYTHING, I'M INJURED AND SICK, WHAT CAN I DO TO CHANGE THE COURSE OF THE WORLD…

Sigh…patience. This is what all brews underneath my calm demeanor, my grand mirror image of Condolet extravagance and kingly optimism. People are _dying_…I'm reaching out to grasp something totally out of my reach and dissolvable like snow. Everyday voices (yes, I'm hearing voices now too) whisper insults into my ears and somehow convince me to believe them. A slideshow of mistakes pass over my eyes, so much that I have to shut them completely to try and chase them away. It's almost constant, and every time I look into another's eyes and see the hurt swimming there, I break.

Shiuh is perhaps the best release I can fathom. There is a comfort in a horse's wings, a peacefulness that they offer that I couldn't possibly give myself. As such, I'm spending much more time in the stables then almost anywhere else.

At night when I'm tossing and turning to escape the haunting of my mind I can somewhat find a tiny, small thing to grasp onto to keep me from slipping away, from slowly diving into myself and silently becoming insane. I hear the distant lullaby I listened to from the safe house drifting sweetly and from a great distance in my heart, and I pretend that Rain's arms are wrapped around me, the only shielded place I can immediately go to avoid the voices until I stop twisting and go to sleep.

But not even sleep is a sanctuary anymore because, as sweet and as comforting as they are, my visions of Rain can't stop the nightmares.

*

The terror of my own screams has me half awake, half trapped in dreams. I can hear the raw throated yells erupting from my inside like a sore, painful whiplash that's been festering with injury for a very long time, but is now so sickly that it is forcing itself to be heard. The only thing that I could compare to my shouts were the screams of the anguished, possibly the dying. I hear footsteps and Dad shakes my shoulder for five minutes straight, but I can't wake up, I can't wake up.

Why can't I wake up? Why can't I wake up!

"Yang! Yang, you're going to wake everyone up! For the sake of the castle, listen to me!" Dad orders.

His growl snaps me out of the dream. I bolt upright in bed like somebody has jolted me with a tazer, take a large, quivering breath, and start absolutely bawling.

"There now," Dad says, handing me a tissue and giving me a glass of water. "It's alright. Only a dream."

Only a dream. He's getting really good at this. Must be from all the practice. It takes at least a half an hour for Dad to get me to calm down, to stop crying. He has me drink at least some of a glass of water so it ends up in my throat (instead of down my shirt) an doesn't take his hand off my back until I'm done quivering. It's a little bit longer before I can finally say in a raspy voice, "At least its been the only one this week,"

Dad gives me a look. "What are you talking about? You've been dreaming every night. I've never heard anyone scream so much in my entire life."

I blink, then rub my hand over my face. "I guess I just can't remember. I'm so tired…"

"What are you dreaming about anyway? Maybe if we resolve your fears you won't have any more dreams," Dad says.

"I…I…."

"Never mind," Dad says quickly. "I won't bring it up again. Just try to get at least some sleep, okay? For all of us?"

Like I have a choice. I nod anyway and he says, "Good." He ruffles my hair and he then leaves to rest in his own chambers.

I rest my arms on my knees and my head on my arms, looking out my giant window at the moon. I am terrified of going back to sleep though, because my nightmares hold only two persons for me. One is Yin, looking at me sadly and pitifully, and the other is a deep, dark pair of sapphire eyes, the rest of the body being shaded by the hood.

In my nightmares, the person I know that is Evin's raises her hands and throws Yin in a cage, then starts to torture me. That's when I begin to scream.

The worst part is that this nightmare isn't too far from reality, if Evin is as strong as Terrence says she is. No matter what happens, a face-off with her is the last thing I want. I don't know why but I want to avoid her at all costs. I would even take Eradicus over her.

By the way Yin looks at me in the cage, she agrees with me.

*

"Come on boy, concentrate."

I still have training out in the courtyard, along with everything else. The good thing about this is that I get an extra few hours a day to be with Rain.

The bad thing is, it's exhausting.

"Let him have some air," Rain pleads for my case. "He's been at it forever."

Dad sighs, and then waves his hand at me in a sort of, 'I don't care anymore' sort of way. I go to the water trough and take a deep drink, the ground still wavering around me.

"Hey," Terrence says, coming in and taking a look. "How are things going?"

"Go away Terrence," Dad growls. "Nobody wants you around."

"I would highly beg to differ with you…"

"I won't take this," Rain said, and stomped off into the palace.

I stared into the pool of water, feeling sort of drugged. Something wasn't right. I was so tired, and unbelievable groggy…not to mention the water didn't taste right for some odd reason. I put a hand to my head to wipe off the sweat, and within seconds I'm writhing on the grass.

_A woman sits on a throne, her hand drawled lazily over the side of it, her nails twitching up and down. A young girl, her face hidden in a hood and followed by Rusty, kneels on the floor. "I have done what you requested, mother," Evin says._

_Trinity smiles. "Excellent. It shouldn't be long now, my daughter. Let us see if the plan works. It would be about time it did…"_

The real world returns, and I hear voices swimming around me. "What just happened?" Terrence asks from very far away.

"It's the stupid water," Dad says. "He's allergic to the flavoring. Is it chamomile?"

"They think that it helps your body to fight, so they put it inside,"

"That's what it is alright. He's had a reaction to it once before. Come on kid, you're okay, stand up…"

I did so, shaking as large hives began to sprout up on my skin. I start scratching furiously, glad that my allergy to chamomile wasn't life threatening. Even so, the thought of me passing out scared me, and my vision…Trinity was planning to move. She was going to attack. She. Was. Attacking. But where? WHERE?

"Kid, are you alright? Kid?" Terrence asked.

I was getting too hyped up, and too upset. At least, that's what I think what's happening. My vision was still blurred and I felt lightheaded, delirious. My tongue felt too heavy in my mouth…what was going on? I just kept scratching and scratching, and the more I scratched the worse, yet the better, I felt…

"Yang…" Dad said. I looked down and saw that thick blood was dripping down my fingers and to the ground. He lifted up my sleeve and I saw that it was coated in red liquid; my scars had burst open from all my scratching.

My legs gave out. Terrence caught me at the last second before I hit the ground again and he steadied me, shouting out to my father, "Go get the first aid kit!"

Things happened very quickly after that. I blacked out (but thankfully without the vision this time) and woke up a few minutes later with my arms bandaged, the first aid kit sitting nearby wide open with contents spewed everywhere and Dad looking pretty freaked out. I sat up and said, "Where's Terrence?"

"Terrence and the servants went to go get the nurse, but he's taking forever, I don't know what's keeping him…" Dad said, worried.

"It's okay, I'm fine, there's something I need to tell you-"

"No, you're not! Stay here! I'll go get help myself!" Dad said. He leapt up from the ground and took of running with an extremely high speed for somebody so old. I sat up and put my hand to my head, confused, panicking, and delirious…

Then I saw her. Rain. She had come back, and was looking at only one thing; the bandages on my arms and my blood stained shirt.

"Rain…" I said, "It's not what you think."

It was as if she had never heard me. "You promised you wouldn't!" Rain said, pointing at the blood, her eyes only on the arms that I sliced so often. "You promised!"

"I didn't Rain, not this time, I swear!"

She didn't hear that time either. With tears in her eyes she let out an angry growl and transformed into a snow leopard, sprinting the distance and passing the stables with lightning speed. In one crouch she leaped up…

Right over the safety of the Condolet wall and into the danger of the border. She couldn't go out there. Trinity was waiting, and so was Eradicus and Evin. She didn't know that. I stood up to follow her, running after her path. She couldn't have gotten far…but I couldn't jump that wall, not like she did. I wasn't half cat. I reached the wall and looked upward; how was I to scale up it?

At that instant everything dissolved into pitch blackness around me. It was so dark that I thought I had fainted, gone into another vision from the fright. I twisted and turned on the spot, wandering around and into things. So I hadn't passed out and I was still conscious, but what was going on? I tried to see the hand I was waving in front of my face; I might as well have done nothing at all.

The realization that I was blind fell upon me, and that's when the screaming started.

_You guys are such great readers…you have no idea how much your reviews make me laugh, or how they can brighten me up in a tough day. You're fantastic! One more chapter to go and I'll reveal the surprise...huzzah!_


	15. Ever Night on Falling Rain

My hands groped the side of the wall, feeling for some sort of direction as I blindly stumbled, banging into things until there were bruises rising up on my head. The screaming around me wasn't coming from me, surprisingly; I had found my voice vanished, extinguished. No, it was the others screaming. Women and children and men, horses on the loose and babies wailing into the night.

Everything was dark. There was nothing around, everything nonexistent. The only thing that was sustainable was touchable. But yet if I was the one who couldn't see, why was everyone else yelling? It didn't make any sense…

Someone was calling out that they were blind. So it wasn't just me. Everybody else couldn't see either. A shadow had been cast over the land, and if my predictions were right, it could have only been the result of one person.

I tripped and fell on my face. I tried to rise to my feet to gather my bearings but it was impossible. Unable to stand and wobble my way around, I simply crawled. The grass smelled the same, felt the same, but it wasn't the same, because I couldn't see it.

But that wasn't true…I knew it wasn't. It was real, I just didn't think it was because I couldn't vision it.

_The things that we can't see are the most real things of all, _Rain's voice vibrated in my head. She had told me that once, a very long time ago shortly after Yin died. The sound of her, the very life and vibrancy in it, brought a spark of panic in me that kept me going. She was out there, somewhere, and probably not likely to see as well. She was in more danger than the rest of us. I had to find her.

But not without a guide. I needed a way to move in the dark, somebody who could see better than I could…

I was about thirty feet from the stables, if I could hear the nervous pounding of hooves against the stall doors correctly. Would he trample me while coming out? Would he even come at all? It was my only chance. Pushing myself off the ground with my arms I opened my mouth and called out in a loud voice, "Shiuh!"

Hoofbeats came rumbling, passing tremors into the earth. I felt them, felt them grow larger and louder as they came closer. A muzzle touched my hair and blew into it, and I grasped his mane, pulling myself up onto my feet. He was here, snorting and shaking and wondering what was going on. Would he spook, me riding him in this pitch blackness? Then again, it wasn't totally dark, at least not for him. He could still partially see, but there was no doubt he still scared.

"You've got to watch out for me, boy. I watch out for you," I whisper. I manage to pull myself onto his back, trying to find a way to go. The wind had been blowing from the east…and the wall was to the west. I felt the air and heard it rushing in the opposite direction.

"That way," I said, directing my horse. He trotted at my command, only going forward because I asked him to, trusting me more than his fear…

There was the wall. He wouldn't go any farther. What was I going to do now? He was tall enough that I could stand on his back and go over, but I would be leaving him behind, and I needed him to see. There was only one way to do it; I would have to blast the wall.

Thank God I had my sword on me. I withdrew the thing and Shiuh danced under me; he knew I was going to do something big. I summoned a power within me, some sort of way to use my skill to break the stone. I lifted my sword.

Nothing happened.

My power wasn't working. Nothing was going on. I banged my sword against my leg and mumbled, "What the heck…"

I tried for ten minutes. I had no luck. I had about as much might as a mouse. No matter what I did, I couldn't even make sparks. I became frustrated, tears sparking in my eyes. Rain was out there…

Shiuh started shuffling, knowing that I was anxious. This wasn't good; he had no bridle, so I couldn't bring his head around if he got loose. I was controlling him with only my legs.

There was a critical factor I was missing here. The darkness was taking my power, taking everything that I had to fight back. I knew that I had to find a way out of it…but how?

_There is no stronger force in the universe than the strength that love carries, _a voice whispered in my head. There was a pounding pain within me when I heard it, but it was a pain that I wanted to have; Yin said that to me. It had always been one of her favorite phrases to say.

Her wisdom came to me then, and I gentled Shiuh, caressing him to a stop. I knew what I needed to do.

I closed my eyes. I didn't need them anyway. I knew what I had to do in order to get the power I needed to bust down this wall.

First was Shiuh. He was easiest, as he was right there with me. I remembered how I loved the smell of him, the muscles he carried and the power that he had. I enjoyed the long rides with him and galloping across meadows. With each hoof beat that I felt there was a small jolting of a spark.

Next was my friends. Emily, Mark, Lina, and all the rest. Although I hadn't seen them much at all after Yin died, I still cared about them. As I thought of each one in turn and the times we shared I could feel the spark growing bigger.

Dad. I had to smile as I thought of the old man, the one who had given me life. I shook my head as I played back times of when he ruffled my hair, had cracked a pun filled joke or when he had found out I was a cutter. The spark grew to a flame now, a medium sized ball of hope.

…The power grew in leaps and bounds as I remembered her. Her deep blue eyes, her pretty smile. She had so much life, only to be extinguished at the last minute. My twin sister, my double, my little annoyance and my always-be-there. She never knew that she couldn't promise that to me. I didn't either. We had hoped for it though, forever and always, through every fight and every inch of hurt we put each other through. We really had cared for each other at the end of every day. I loved her. I loved her still. My only regret was that I had never told her that enough.

Yes! Almost there! But I needed a little more, something to finish this strength building up in me. I sighed and imagined the one face I had been trying not to see, the one face I had been putting off. It was the person that I loved more than I hated myself; Rain.

It was hard at first. I was scared to imagine her because she had been angry at me. But once I thought of her face something hit me; she had only gotten angry because she actually cared that I cut myself. It hurt her, hurt her deeply, that I needed to bleed to stop the doubts and the noise. She didn't like it that I needed pain…she wanted me to need her more.

I opened my eyes and watched as a great, shining white light burst out of my sword and tore the wall apart. Shiuh back stepped in amazement and my mouth fell open in wonder as the light didn't end; it cut right through the danger and created a beacon, a light that shone on for hundreds of feet.

I could see now. I held my sword out and yelled, "Charge!" Shiuh jumped over the stones and I held on tightly as we barreled over them, making way towards the great plains and to look for my friend…my beloved.

We kept running until the plains came to an end. We entered a bamboo forest, Shiuch cracking the branches with his hooves and I cutting them down, waving my light everywhere like a giant, radiant flashlight. I slowed him with my voice and looked around…I needed a clue, a way to know where she was…

My robe was dragging through the bushes. Dad had thrown it back on me, to try and keep me warm when I was out of it. It was a burden now, and was only slowing up my pace. The expensive thing was getting torn in the branches, but I couldn't get rid of it. _She_ would know I was out here.

Before we could take another step my sword light suddenly went out. At once something started attacking me, and Shiuh rose up on his hind legs, pawing at the air. I swiped around with my weapon but I wasn't hitting anything; once again, I couldn't see.

"Come on, come on, work for me here!" I pleaded. I closed my eyes and an image of Yin and I embracing burst into my head. The sword suddenly lit up in a beam so passionate that I could see who my enemies were.

The only way to describe them were black ghosts. Small streaks of paint, attacking the both of us by swirling through the air and slamming into us with their bodies. I brought up my sword and bashed one in the head; it gave a shrill shriek and vanished.

Now that I had light the ghosts seemed to flee. They tried attacking from the sides, but I remembered the day that Lina had found me under the tunnel in town, half dead and freezing, and the beacon illumined everywhere. There were terrible shrieks as all the ghosts crumbled into dust.

Or so I had thought. When I reckoned it was over a ghost came up from behind me and bit me right on the neck. I fell off of Shiuh, screaming and holding a hand to my injury. The horse took off, terrified and I slammed my sword into the remaining ghost. He crumbled.

_He'll know where to go. He's a horse. He'll be fine, _I tried to reassure myself in my head. Shiuh was an animal. He would find his way back easily enough. He would be safe.

The thing was, now that my speed and transportation was gone, would I be? I drew my hand away from the wound. Blood. Nothing I hadn't seen before. I touched it again and felt it already clotting up. So I would be fine…as long as nothing in this darkness was attracted to the smell.

The sword was pulsating. Already the light was starting to fade. I had to keep the light going now. It was my life source. Shiuh wasn't here to get me back if it went out, and once I couldn't see there was no way I would be able to grope my way back to the castle. No turning back now.

I made sure both hands were on the hilt as I continued on my path. Something white on the ground caught my eye; snow leopard fur. Steadying myself, I followed the trail, realizing that she never could have lost so much hair unless somebody was ripping it out of her…

I heard yowling. I quickened my pace, my footsteps hitting the grass lightly. I called out, "Rain!" and lifted my sword up to defend.

There she was, sitting in a circle and lashing her hands out at dozens and dozens of ghosts as they nipped at her hair and her face. Enraged, I charged forward through the mob of dark haunters, grabbed her hand, and watched as they all fried and sizzled. Barbeque.

"Yang," Rain coughed. She was scratched all over, and hurt. She wasn't wearing anything, as she had been a leopard when she ran out, and she was hunched over, trying to cover herself up.

"Here," I said, shrugging off the cumbersome robe. It was enough to cover her completely, and she tied the sash around her waist to make sure it didn't come undone. When she was dressed she fell into my arms and said, "You came looking for me!"

"Of course. You didn't think I wouldn't, did you?" I said softly.

"I got angry, and I ran…it got so dark so quickly…"

"I know. It's everywhere." I said.

"You broke it," she said, pulling away and looking at me with amazement. "Nothing I did gave off a light, but you! You truly are a king."

"Maybe," I said. "Rain, I want you to know, I didn't cut myself earlier. I got an allergic reaction to something and I started scratching at my skin. That's why I was bleeding. It wasn't what you thought."

"I am stupid," she said, shaking her head. "I had assumed too much."

"It doesn't matter now. The only thing that matters is getting back to the castle."

"I can't change back," Rain said. "I could see well enough in this darkness with my cat eyes but as I made my way back to the castle I couldn't hold my form…I got lost once I became a person."

"It's taking everybody's power," I told her. "But I have a light, and if we can make it back maybe there's a way we can help out everyone. Come on."

I took her hand and we walked through the black, cutting through the pitch night like it was fog as my sword lit the way.

As we walked my head was swarming with ideas. A light bringer. Me. I could cut through any darkness and light the way with love. That was my power. That had always been my power, and I had never realized it. As I understood this, another idea came to me.

My family had got it wrong…they had named us backwards. _I _was the light and Yin had been the darkness. That's why she was always so drawn to the more blacker side. They had naturally assumed, her being the girl and I being the boy, that she was the positive and I was the negative. But Yang was light, Yin was dark…how could they have overlooked that critical factor…

Then it hit me. They hadn't.

Rain gave another scream. My sword's light danced and I turned to see her being carried away by the scruff of the neck by a griffin…a red griffin.

"Eradicus!" I shouted, angrily charging after him. I ran quickly but he easily outpaced me, grinning as he carried Rain up the sides of a cliff, climbing with ease as was struggling to climb. He began to fly and hover, taking her up to the top of the mountain and ignoring her attempts to make him let her go.

Gritting my teeth I yelled, "What? My mother couldn't do the dirty work, so she made you do it for her? Or did she just want to keep her precious little Evin at home? What's the matter Eradicus, they have you working like a dog now? I'm not surprised…they're more powerful than you on a bad day!"

Eradicus dropped Rain down on the side of a rock. He then charged at me, beak open and talons exposed. I shined my light right into his face and he let out a cry of pain, falling down and pinning me beneath his weight.

"Oh no you don't!" I said, then I kicked him away. I went to gut his belly but he knocked the sword out of my hands, and it went flying through the air several feet away and landing out of my reach.

"You think you know everything," he hissed, swishing his tail and ready to pounce. "Answer this one, little boy, where is your sister now when you need her?"

I backed away, looking for a way out. There were none.

"I'll tell you where she is!" he said, raising up on his back legs and preparing to strike. "She's-"

Eradicus let out a screech as Rain slid from her place on the high rock and tackled him to the ground. She bit right behind his neck just like she would have done if she could have been a leopard. He groaned and yelled, "Little brat! I'll break your neck on the rocks!"

"No!" I cried out. Eradicus seized her and carried her up, up, far away from me and in a place that was unreachable. At the top of the mountain he hovered and yelled, "Let's have a little repeat, shall we?"

His talons unlocked and Rain went plummeting downward. Eradicus laughed and screamed, "This ever night will always be! It will never end!"

"Rain!" I cried. I ran to where she was falling, planning out where I was going to jump and how I was going to do it…I wouldn't let her die like Yin had.

Eradicus was still laughing. I passed my sword on the ground and picked it up as I charged towards the ledge. Hoping my plan would work, I leapt off of the edge as Rain was just about to pass it.

I soared through the air, dragging my sword in my right hand and catching her with my other. We went downward and I dug my weapon into the rock on the other side, creating a wedge and halting our descent. She gasped and clung to me, looking down at the far drop below.

"Climb." My voice shook. I couldn't hold us for long.

Rain did. She grabbed onto the rock and dragged herself onto the flat surface, helping me up and crying as she embraced me, thanking me for saving my life.

"Why won't you just _die_?" Eradicus screamed, still at the mountain above. He made a bullet line straight for us, wings tucked in and beak going headfirst…

The beam of light hit him head on. He began to screech and writhe in midair as the power held him on the spot, unable to move. I never dropped my sword, never once removed it from in front of my face. After five minutes he collapsed on the ground, covered in a heap of red feathers and fully human. He looked down at his hands and said, "What…what happened?"

"I took your morphing away. You can't change into a griffin anymore." I said. My voice wasn't shaking now.

This prospect was enough to fully enrage him. He got up, breathing raggedly, and charged once again, arms outstretched. I shielded Rain and held out my blade in front of me.

A horse let out a wild scream and Eradicus yelled as Shiuh came out of nowhere, trampling him into the dirt and kicking him over the cliff side. Shiuh snorted angrily as he turned to me, and I clung onto Rain as something hit the bottom; Eradicus was no more.

We both got up slowly from the ground with shaking limbs and making sure the other one was okay. When we were done I stroked my horse, kissing his forehead. "Good boy," I said. "You saved our lives. You didn't leave. Good boy."

I helped Rain on top of him and sat behind her, looking around through the pitch black silence to see if there was anywhere we could go.

"Yang," Rain said. "Your light is dying out."

I looked down to the sword in my hand. What she said was true. The beam was pulsating, as if the heart inside was starting to beat slower.

"I don't think we have enough to make it back," I said, letting it drop, giving up hope. "The kingdom is going to have to find a way to kill the dark without me."

Rain looked down. She was calmly accepting our demise, this slow torture that would end us eventually. She then looked back up at me, staring straight into my eyes, gray into lavender. "At least I will go in peace. If I have to die with anyone, I want it to be you."

I had planned to say a thank you, but that's not what happened next. The next thing I knew I could see every tear glistening on her eyelashes, and I was so surprised that I forgot to close my eyes.

It wasn't until she had pulled away that I realized that she had leaned forward and given me a small kiss right on the lips.

It was warm, it was soft, and above all, it was great. It left me wanting more. It was something I hadn't expected, a huge slap right to the face. Yet I wanted to be slapped again and again. Rain looked at me, her eyes searching, my own as wide as dinner plates.

I plunged the sword above my head. It burst out a light so large that the darkness instantly left; the light went on for miles and miles, halting the horrible night and bringing life back to the world again. I told Rain to hang on and Shiuh traveled quickly down the cliff, coming back onto the land and galloping for joy back to the castle, back to our home.

Everywhere I went the darkness fled to reveal a beautiful, lovely sunset. I made it to the castle and people cheered as the light came back, and the day returned. Once every last inch of the night was gone I put my sword back in its sheath, promising to polish it later for a job well done. Terrence was there with his mouth wide open, along with all the council officials. Bennett came up to my side next to Shiuh and stammered, "You were right my king, Evin sent a horrible darkness through the unprotected section…we will doubt you no more!"

_Told you, _the child in me spat but I answered like a king and said, "It's over. But next time, will you all please listen to me?"

"Always," Bennett bowed. I trotted Shiuh to the stables through the crowd and put him back in his stall, saying to the stable boy, "Tend to him well. I want him cooled down and groomed, and after that make sure he gets fed extremely well. A few treats would also be good."

"Anything, my liege!" the excited servant exclaimed, glad to be able to see again. I patted my horse on the head, whispering to him, "I'll be back. I owe you one." I then called up a few guards and made my way through the cheering mob, all of them desperate to get a glimpse of me. Once I was inside the castle somebody enveloped me in a giant, crushing hug.

"_Were. You. Insane?" _ Dad growled, nearly breaking my bones with the force of his embrace. I try to struggle away unsuccessfully and choke out, "Rain was out there…I had to find her. I brought the light back, by the way."

"Obviously." Dad said. He let me go and sighed, his whole body trembling with relief. "Everyone thought you were dead out there."

"So did I. But like I said, I had to find Rain." I smiled at her, and she smiled back. Now that Dad was here though the feeling between me and Rain was kind of awkward…not to mention that there was something I had to ask him that had been bugging me on the ride back.

"Is there anything you won't do for this girl?" Dad said, running a hand through his hair and shaking his head. He put a hand on my back and said, "Up to the balcony. Your subjects are waiting for you."

A shiver ran up my spine. We climbed the steps to the great valance, and as I looked out I saw hundreds upon hundreds of people. They broke out into a thunderous roar when they saw me, jumping up and down and going practically insane.

"All hail King Nightstaryang!" the herald called out, but I held up a hand to pause him. The crowd quieted. I opened my mouth and yelled to the crowd, "That is no longer my name! I banish it! From now on I cast away the name my father has given me, and will come to a new one!"

"What is it, oh great and noble leader?" A voice cried from the crowd. I could feel my Dad stiffen in shock, and Rain gaze at me in confusion.

It went dead silent. Then I said, "I am King Lightstaryang, son of Yomen and brother of Evernightayin!"

The crowd roared in victory. They suddenly began chanting my name, "Lightstar, Lightstar!"

"Go home to your families!" I said. "Love them and be with them, for that is more important than almost anything! Be happy for what you have, for you can see again!"

The crowd cheered again. They still never ceased to scream my name. I turned to Dad and said, "Will you come to my room? I need to talk to you. Alone," I said as Rain caught my eye inquisitively.

"Sure. Leave us," Dad said to the guards. They did so and we went back inside the castle traveling up to my exquisite bedroom and shutting the door.

"What was that all about?" Dad asked, trying to act confused. I turned on my heels and said, "Don't act like you don't know what I was talking about out there. You have the perfect idea."

"I don't know what…"

"You got our names wrong on purpose, didn't you? Nightstaryang and Everlightayin."

The color drained from his face as a nightmare clashed upon him. "How did you figure this out?"

I ignored the question. "There was one twin that had to go," I said. "It was called for. So who did you choose?"

"I chose no one!" Dad burst out. The effect was as if I had rammed a blade into his chest.

"You thought that by naming me after the dark, that Yin would have a better chance of staying good, even though you knew the elders said that darkness would fall with the twin with the blue eyes?" I asked, remembering my vision. "You thought that you would switch our roles, even though it had been destined?"

It was killing my dad, but he knew he had to answer. So he looked me straight in the eyes, stood stick still and said, "Yes."

I said nothing. Neither did he. The orange rays of the sun twisted through the window as he turned to leave, his hand on the door. "But don't think that I didn't love you," Dad said, pausing and trying to make it right. "That was never it at all."

The door closed quietly leaving me alone. Leaving me with the prospect that my parents had dealt me.

They chose her over me. Maybe it's because they thought I would be stronger, and more resistant to evil or something. They had tried to make me be the one who fell and her the one who remained good. They had tried to balance the name out, putting Yin, "dark" at the end of Everlight, and Yang, "light" at the end of Nightstar, but it still hadn't worked. I still ended up with light. And Yin had still been dark.

But what did the elders know now, anyway? Yin was dead.

I went to my window, watching over my land with the protectiveness of a leader. There was a knock on my door and I said, "Come in," only because I knew it was her.

Rain entered, now wearing her own clothes and with bandages on her injuries. She shut the door and came up to my side, watching the skies with me. "Beautiful, isn't it?"

I smiled. "Yeah, but I can think of a few things that can beat it."

Rain smiled too. She tugged at her dress, smoothing it out and dragging her fingers across her arm. "Let me ask this one, Lightstar," she said. "Do you love me?

My heart thudded, and I turned away from the window to instead look at her. "Of course I do. I wouldn't have come after you if I didn't."

"No, I mean, _really_ love me. As in, that way. As in…romantically."

I gulped. My head was going a mile a minute. _Love you? Obviously! I adore the way you smile and the way you gaze at me, I love the way you look and every little tiny thing you've done! You're my best friend, my help, my support and my future, and if I were old enough I'd marry you right now! I don't want anyone else, I want you, and I want you to love me too! Do you love me?_

That's what I was thinking.

Unfortunately that's not what I could let out.

"No." I said calmly, putting as little emotion into the reply as possible. "I don't like you that way."

"Don't or can't?" she asked, blinking once.

_Can't. _"Don't."

"Are you sure?" she said. "Or are you lying to me?"

"Rain I…" I said. "I just…don't. I'm sorry if you're upset."

Great. There went my last shot to be with her. She bit her lip and turned away, obviously unhappy. Yet it was for her own good, and for that I was willing to sacrifice any happiness.

"I must be a poor kisser. I'm sorry you didn't enjoy it."

_Oh I enjoyed it all right_. "It wasn't that bad," I said, remembering the glory of it.

"I'm not sorry I did it, though," she said, turning back to me. "I really thought we were going to die out there."

"So did I."

"I'm fine," she suddenly said, turning her frown into a smile. "I suppose that I just thought…well…maybe…"

"Yeah," I laughed. Inside though, my heart was breaking.

"Do you think…do you think that I'll ever meet somebody, then? A poor girl like me?"

_I'm right here! _I wanted to scream, but I muffled it down. "Totally! You're going to meet somebody great one day, somebody who could take better care of you than I could. Someday you'll meet a boy that's lucky to have you." _Somebody who isn't me._

Rain laughed. "How do you know this?"

I put my arm around her shoulder. "I'm king! What I say goes, or else."

"Whatever you say, your majesty," she laughed. I laughed too and we watched as a beautiful sunset descended on orange wings and glowed through the land of Condolet.

*

The sapphire eyes peered into the mirror; the girl swirled her hand around the pool, watching as the boy below embraced his black haired friend protectively.

"So you managed to bring the light back, then, after I sent the night," the girl hushed. "You're stronger than I thought."

She peered closer into the pool, her face cloaked in shadow. She saw how the family celebrated together cheerfully, the entire court praising them for their actions. The girl scowled; he now had the citizens on his side. She cast ripples into the water and they vibrated across the boy's purple eyes and over his handsome face.

"I'll chase after you, Lightstar," Evin whispered. "The new leader of Condolet won't last long. You can be sure of that. Sooner or later I'll know who I am, and you'll be out of my mother's way. The showdown between you and me is coming, and when the time is right, we'll see each other face to face. When that battle finally does come, I cannot lose. Even though you have the light, I am the darkness, and my night will snuff out your sun. You're going to fail, and I am going to win."

_So that's the end! Hope you enjoyed the extremely long and massive chapter! So the surprise is…there's going to be a sequel! I hope you'll love it. For now stay tuned, and the first chapter of the final installment of the Nightstar series will be released soon. Review pllllleeeeeeaaaassssseeeee, and happy reading!_


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